Salary is the major factor considered while choosing the job. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Today we live in a world that values talented people and there are a wide range of job opportunitieswide job opportunities. Nowadays, choosing a career is not limited only to the monetary returns but also various factors like workplace suitability, work and life balance, etc. are considered to be vital. However, I believeI believe, salary remainsstill remains to be the most important consideration while choosing a job.
At the beginningIn the beginning phase of a career, the person's salarysalary of the persons remains the main source of income to meet the financial needs of the family. For example, a newly qualified engineerany fresher engineer will look for athe better salary package to support his family and meet the basic living requirements. A good income initially will also help the person advance their careerhelp the person for his further career growth, as theirthe previous salary is always considered as a base for the nextnest pay risehike.
Further, in the social context, a person with a good incomegood earning is considered to be successfulprestigious and is likelyand, likely to get more marriage proposals and respect. He also sets an example of having a successful career and prospective graduates look up to him as a benchmark. In his personal life,While, in personal life, he can offer his family a luxurious lifestylelife along with the best education and help fulfil their dreams.
On the other hand, many people believe that workplace suitabilitythe workplace suitability in terms of location, transportation and workplace environment are also quite important. For example, if a person takes up a job situated 20 kilometres away with no convenient transport, will have ill effects on his health and family life. Job satisfaction and a friendly work environmentand friendly work environment are equally important, for example, if an artist is mistakenly assigned to a marketing jobwrongly assigned a marketing job he will not be motivated and satisfied which will affect his performance. Although other measures are also valuable while choosing a career option, salary remains the most important deciding factorsalary still maintains the most valued deciding factor.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear position and supports it with several relevant financial, social, and practical considerations, giving the discussion a logical overall direction. Its main limitation is that some claims remain simplistic and the language contains recurring awkward collocations and sentence-structure errors. The highest-priority improvement is to develop the strongest reasons more critically while revising articles, clause structure, and word combinations for greater precision.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained and supported with several relevant reasons and examples, although some claims are insufficiently examined.
Develop fewer supporting reasons more critically by explaining their relevance and acknowledging limitations in the social-status argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through distinct aspects of the argument, but some transitions and sentence links are mechanical or awkward.
Use clearer topic sentences and integrate contrasting points smoothly instead of relying on abrupt markers such as isolated uses of while.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonably varied vocabulary for employment and personal priorities, though inaccurate collocations recur.
Replace awkward combinations such as good earning and most valued deciding factor with precise, natural employment-related phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures conveys meaning clearly, but article, preposition, punctuation, and clause-construction errors are frequent.
Prioritize complete clause structures and accurate articles, especially in conditional examples and sentences beginning with contrast markers.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Salary is the major factor considered while choosing the job. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.