Some high schools require all students to wear school uniforms. Other high schools permit students to decide what to wear to school. Which of these two school policies do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Sample Response
I think that the issue whether all students are required to wear school uniform is the one that is open for debate. Some people think that all students must wear the school uniform. However, others think that students should decide what to wear to school themselves or by their parents. Personally, I believe that students should wear what they like. For several reasons, which I will mention bellow, I think that school uniforms should not be required to wear at high school level.
First of all, if students do not have school uniforms they can wear what they like to wear. Personally, I like to wear clothes which are comfortable. Also, I am a female and I like to wear jeans and shorts, and as far as I know girls must wear skirts as part of their school uniform. I think many female students will agree with me that jeans are much more comfortable than skirts.
Second of all, I believe that school uniforms must not cause any discomfort. For example, some international students will find it unacceptable to wear some of the uniform's parts. I am from Russia and when I was a student of the elementary school I was required to wear the school uniform that included a dark blue skirt and a white or light blue shirt. I did not like it very much because I did not like the fact that all students were dressed in the same colour. We dressed the same way and we were permitted to wear any adornments. Personally, I did not like the fact that girls always had to wear skirts and it was not convenient, especially in cold weather.
In short, I think that students should wear to school what they want. Otherwise, if a high school requires students to wear school uniforms, I think that uniforms must be comfortable for all students.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Add the needed preposition Original: the issue whether Suggested revision: the issue of whether Why it matters: The noun issue requires of before an embedded whether-clause.
- 2. Make the phrase concise Original: is the one that is open for debate Suggested revision: is open to debate Why it matters: The shorter expression conveys the same idea without redundant wording.
- 3. Express the policy accurately Original: do not have school uniforms Suggested revision: are not required to wear school uniforms Why it matters: The issue is whether uniforms are compulsory, rather than whether students possess them.
- 4. Close the introductory phrase Original: as far as I know girls Suggested revision: as far as I know, girls Why it matters: A comma is required after the introductory clause before the main subject.
- 5. Use a formal sequencer Original: Second of all Suggested revision: Secondly Why it matters: Secondly provides a more concise and formal transition to the next main point.
- 6. Use natural noun order Original: some of the uniform's parts Suggested revision: some parts of the uniform Why it matters: Parts of the uniform is the natural construction for individual uniform items.
- 7. Remove close repetition Original: I did not like it very much because I did not like the fact that Suggested revision: I disliked the fact that Why it matters: The revision avoids repeating did not like while preserving the reason given.
- 8. Match the plural reference Original: it was not convenient Suggested revision: they were impractical Why it matters: The pronoun and verb should agree with the plural noun skirts, and impractical fits clothing better.
- 9. Use a contrast marker Original: Otherwise Suggested revision: However Why it matters: The final sentence qualifies the preceding preference, so a contrast marker is needed rather than a consequence marker.
- 10. Use the plural form Original: uniform Suggested revision: uniforms Why it matters: The plural form matches the general reference to uniforms worn by all students.
- 11. Generalize the noun Original: must wear the school uniform Suggested revision: must wear school uniforms Why it matters: The plural form is more natural when discussing a general school policy.
- 12. State the choice precisely Original: students should wear what they like. Suggested revision: students should choose their own clothing. Why it matters: The revision expresses the preferred policy directly and concisely.
Suggested Rewrites
- the issue whether the issue of whether
- is the one that is open for debate is open to debate
- do not have school uniforms are not required to wear school uniforms
- as far as I know girls as far as I know, girls
- Second of all Secondly
- some of the uniform's parts some parts of the uniform
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response gives a clear preference for allowing students to choose their clothes, and its personal examples make the comfort argument easy to understand. Development is narrow and repetitive, with much of the discussion focused on skirts rather than comparing the wider effects of the two policies; strengthen the essay by adding a distinct second reason and explaining how it supports the preferred policy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers the question with a consistent position and relevant examples, but its reasons are repetitive and only moderately developed.
Add a separate policy-based reason, such as individuality or cost, and develop its consequences with a specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall progression is clear and paragraphing is appropriate, though sequencing devices are mechanical and the second body paragraph circles around the same point.
Organize each body paragraph around a genuinely distinct reason and use logical connections within the explanation rather than formulaic labels.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for the topic and meaning remains clear, despite repetition, a spelling error, and several awkward word combinations.
Replace repeated phrases about comfort and wearing clothes with more precise vocabulary about choice, practicality, identity, and school policy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms is used with generally clear meaning, but article, preposition, and passive-construction errors recur.
Review noun phrases and passive patterns, especially forms such as the issue of whether and uniforms should not be required.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some high schools require all students to wear school uniforms. Other high schools permit students to decide what to wear to school. Which of these two school policies do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.