You have approximately 40 minutes to complete this task. You need to write an essay addressing the topic below The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Your essay should comprise a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Response
In recent years, the idea of reducing the working week and extending the weekend has gained significant attention. I completely agree that a shorter working week coupled with a longer weekend would be highly beneficial.
First and foremost, a shorter working week can significantly enhance productivity. When employees have fewer days to complete their tasks, they are likely to focus better and work more efficiently. For instance, research conducted by Microsoft in Japan demonstrated that a four-day work week led to a 40% increase in productivity. This example clearly illustrates that a condensed work schedule can lead to more concentrated efforts and improved outcomes, thereby supporting the notion that shorter work weeks boost productivity.
Another reason worth mentioning is that extending the weekend would greatly improve workers' mental health and well-being. Longer weekends provide employees with more time to relax, pursue personal interests, and spend quality time with their families, which is essential for maintaining a healthy work-life balance. For example, a study by the American Psychological Association found that employees who had more extended breaks reported lower stress levels and higher job satisfaction. This evidence highlights the positive impact of longer weekends on employees' overall well-being, underlining the importance of giving workers more time to recharge.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that a shorter working week and a longer weekend would be highly advantageous. Enhanced productivity and improved mental health are compelling reasons to support this change in work schedules. By adopting this approach, both businesses and employees can benefit significantly.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Simplify the link Original: coupled Suggested revision: together Why it matters: The simpler phrase makes the relationship between the two proposed changes more direct.
- 2. Use precise wording Original: focus better Suggested revision: concentrate more effectively Why it matters: Concentrate more effectively is more precise and formal in this context.
- 3. Keep terminology consistent Original: work Suggested revision: working Why it matters: Working week matches the terminology used throughout the rest of the response.
- 4. Reduce wordiness Original: Another reason worth mentioning is that Suggested revision: Another important reason is that Why it matters: The revision introduces the next reason more concisely.
- 5. Use the natural collocation Original: more extended breaks Suggested revision: longer breaks Why it matters: Longer breaks is the idiomatic expression for increased break duration.
- 6. Refine the collocation Original: change in work schedules Suggested revision: change to working patterns Why it matters: Change to working patterns describes the proposed adjustment more naturally.
- 7. Strengthen parallel wording Original: reducing the working week and extending the weekend Suggested revision: shortening the working week and lengthening the weekend Why it matters: The paired verbs express the two contrasting changes more precisely.
- 8. Use a direct construction Original: would be highly beneficial Suggested revision: would bring substantial benefits Why it matters: The revision states the expected outcome more directly.
- 9. Refine the collocation Original: can significantly enhance productivity Suggested revision: can substantially improve productivity Why it matters: Improve productivity is the more conventional collocation in this context.
- 10. Name the evidence clearly Original: research conducted by Microsoft Suggested revision: a study conducted by Microsoft Why it matters: A study is a more concrete label for the specific research example.
- 11. Clarify the relative clause Original: which is essential for maintaining a healthy work-life balance Suggested revision: which helps them maintain a healthy work-life balance Why it matters: The revision makes the relationship between the extra time and employees' balance clearer.
- 12. Clarify the reference Original: By adopting this approach Suggested revision: Under this arrangement Why it matters: This phrase refers more precisely to the proposed working pattern.
Suggested Rewrites
- coupled together
- focus better concentrate more effectively
- work working
- Another reason worth mentioning is that Another important reason is that
- more extended breaks longer breaks
- change in work schedules change to working patterns
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is focused, fully relevant, and easy to follow, with two well-developed reasons supported by specific examples and consistently controlled language. The main limitation is a slightly formulaic pattern of signposting and explanation, which makes an otherwise strong argument feel somewhat rehearsed. To improve further, vary the transitions and add a little more nuanced analysis of how shorter weeks could be implemented across different workplaces.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is direct and both supporting reasons are relevant, clearly extended, and illustrated with specific evidence.
Add a brief qualification about which workplaces may benefit most to make the argument even more nuanced.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through well-focused paragraphs, with cohesive devices used clearly throughout the response.
Vary the repeated reason-example-explanation pattern so the progression feels less formulaic.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary conveys the argument fluently, with only occasional slightly rehearsed phrasing.
Use more varied wording for the central concepts instead of repeatedly returning to shorter weeks and longer weekends.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A broad range of complex structures is used accurately, and errors are rare and non-impeding.
Experiment with more concise clause combinations and varied sentence openings while maintaining the same high accuracy.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
You have approximately 40 minutes to complete this task. You need to write an essay addressing the topic below The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Your essay should comprise a minimum of 250 words.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.