When students are in large classes it is very hard for the teachers to give every student individual attention. What can educational authorities do about this?

Sample Response

Undeniably, it has rarely become possible that tutors have enough supervision on each pupil in institutes with roomy classes. This can negatively influence students’ educational performance, and to tackle this issue, I personally believe that school authorities must implement some practical solutions, including raising the educational budget, using the latest versions of learning methods and changing the designs of seats in these classes.

To start with, one pivotal solution is that the needed educational funds must be provided. Definitely, by having a higher financial backup, not only more instructors will be hired, but a fewer numbers of students will be involved in teaching in each classroom. As a prime example, instead of participation of over one hundred applicants in each classroom in UBC University, a very popular university in Canada, consideration of more money for hiring of more employees will help educators to teach less than fifty people instead of over hundred ones, and the overall quality of teaching will be improved phenomenally.

Another important method is the usage of modern teaching systems in these classes. Obviously, using some technical facilities will lead all trainees to understand better the study subjects taught by their teacher. In particular, showing pictures or videos on a large screen is to become a common method in many lecture rooms, and instead of using a whiteboard, which could only be seen by less than half of the total students, for all participants, a more clear and accurate image can be shown. Therefore, educators can explain more deeply the study materials to each student.

Lastly, the next approach is the modification in designing of seats. Admittedly, had chairs been installed in a circle in these classes, the instructor would have a better control on each person; however, unfortunately, students’ seats are used to be designed in rows, and those sitting on the rear lines cannot be supervised by their teacher in a perfect way.

In brief, in roomy classes, all scholars cannot be taught appropriately. In my view, school authorities should implement several empiric methods to come up with this problem. In my view, this can be booming the budget for registration of more teachers, applying novel teaching systems and changing the seats in a correct way in these classes.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Use natural teaching terminology Original: the latest versions of learning methods Suggested revision: modern teaching methods Why it matters: Methods do not have latest versions in this context, while modern teaching methods conveys the intended idea.
  • 2. Name the classroom layout Original: the designs of seats Suggested revision: seating arrangements Why it matters: Seating arrangements is the natural term for how classroom seats are organised.
  • 3. Use a natural funding phrase Original: the needed educational funds Suggested revision: the necessary education funding Why it matters: Necessary education funding is the standard noun phrase for the required budget.
  • 4. Name the budget directly Original: a higher financial backup Suggested revision: a larger education budget Why it matters: Education budget clearly identifies the financial resource being increased.
  • 5. Invert after not only Original: not only more instructors will be hired Suggested revision: not only will more instructors be hired Why it matters: Not only at the start of this clause requires subject-auxiliary inversion.
  • 6. Fix quantity and passive meaning Original: but a fewer numbers of students will be involved in teaching Suggested revision: but fewer students will be taught Why it matters: Fewer directly modifies students, and students are taught rather than involved in teaching.
  • 7. Use concise method wording Original: the usage of modern teaching systems Suggested revision: the use of modern teaching methods Why it matters: Use is more concise than usage, and methods accurately names the approach.
  • 8. Name the resources clearly Original: some technical facilities Suggested revision: educational technology Why it matters: Educational technology precisely identifies the screens, pictures, and videos discussed next.
  • 9. Use the classroom noun Original: all trainees Suggested revision: all students Why it matters: Students is the appropriate term for pupils in educational classes.
  • 10. Place the adverb naturally Original: understand better the study subjects Suggested revision: better understand the subject matter Why it matters: Better normally precedes understand, and subject matter is the natural academic noun phrase.
  • 11. Use the present perfect Original: is to become Suggested revision: has become Why it matters: The present perfect describes a method that has developed into common practice.
  • 12. Use the comparative adjective Original: a more clear Suggested revision: a clearer Why it matters: The short adjective clear forms its comparative with -er.

Suggested Rewrites

  • the latest versions of learning methods modern teaching methods
  • the designs of seats seating arrangements
  • the needed educational funds the necessary education funding
  • a higher financial backup a larger education budget
  • not only more instructors will be hired not only will more instructors be hired
  • but a fewer numbers of students will be involved in teaching but fewer students will be taught
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The essay offers three distinct responses to large classes and develops each with explanation or illustration, especially the proposal to fund more teachers. Clear paragraphing helps the reader follow the sequence, but technology and seating are only partly connected to individual attention, while pervasive collocation and grammar errors make many sentences cumbersome. Focus each solution explicitly on teacher-student interaction and edit for natural noun phrases, agreement, and verb patterns.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.

TR

Task Response

7.0
Feedback

Three relevant authority-led measures are explained, although the technology and seating proposals do not fully demonstrate how teachers could give each student individual attention.

Next step

For every solution, state the precise mechanism by which it increases direct teacher-student interaction or reduces class size.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.5
Feedback

Distinct body paragraphs create a clear sequence of solutions, but formulaic transitions, repeated stance phrases, and some overlong sentences weaken cohesion.

Next step

Use direct topic sentences and remove repeated framing such as ‘In my view’ from the conclusion.

LR

Lexical Resource

5.5
Feedback

The response attempts a broad educational vocabulary, but pervasive miscollocations such as ‘roomy classes’, ‘financial backup’, ‘rear lines’, and ‘empiric methods’ reduce clarity.

Next step

Use conventional phrases such as ‘large classes’, ‘additional funding’, ‘back rows’, and ‘practical measures’.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5
Feedback

Complex structures are attempted frequently, but errors in agreement, articles, inversion, comparatives, and verb patterns make many sentences awkward.

Next step

Shorten overloaded sentences and check each clause for a complete subject-verb pattern before adding subordinate detail.

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