As the number of private cars has increased, so too has the level of pollution in many cities. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?
Sample Response
In the past few decades, humanitymankind has made tremendous technological advances and the world hasand world has truly become a small village because of globalisation. Now, increasing numbers of people can affordmore and more people are able to afford cars. This has caused an increase in the level of noise and air pollution in large cities.
One solution would be to impose a high taxa large amount of tax on privately owned carscards. This would discourage people to use their own vehicle to commute to work and utilise other means of public transport. This can definitely reduce trafficreduce the traffic in urban areasurban city areas. However, this only deals with a part of the population. Rich could easily afford to pay the higher tax; while, on the other hand, only poor would be affected by this law.
Another way the governmentAnother way government could tackle this problem is to encourage people to use public transportation. The authoritiesThe legal authorities could introduce more comfortable and convenient trains, buses and metros to attract more people. As a result, more and more citizens would use public transport services and thus the level of traffic and pollution would definitely reduce.
Lastly, the government should put more money into researchresearches to find more renewable energy sourcesmore renewable resources such as solar and wind powersolar power and wind instead of using coal and petrol. In addition, there could be seminars or lectures to educate people about how our lifestyles affectour ways of living are affecting the environment. This may not be a quick solution but it does help to tackle the issueissues at hand in thea long run.
In summary, it is partly the government's and partly individuals' responsibilitypartly government's and partly individual's responsibility to address rising pollutionpay attention to increasing pollution and find ways to reduce it if we want to leave a greener planet forto our children.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear range of solutions, especially progressive taxation and improved public transport, with useful consideration of fairness and implementation. Its main limitation is that renewable energy research is not directly connected to reducing pollution from private cars, while some explanations remain general. The highest priority is to link every proposal explicitly to vehicle emissions, for example through cleaner public transport, electric cars, or reduced car use.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several relevant solutions are proposed and generally explained, with useful recognition that a flat car tax would affect income groups unequally.
Connect renewable-energy investment directly to transport emissions and explain how taxation could be designed fairly enough to change driving behaviour.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses clearly through separate solution paragraphs and uses cohesive devices effectively, though the final body paragraph combines two loosely related measures.
Give clean-transport technology and public education distinct supporting logic or place each in the paragraph where it most directly reinforces the main solution.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate and sometimes flexible for taxation, transport, energy, and pollution, with several noticeable but non-obstructive inaccuracies.
Correct ‘privately owned cars’, ‘investment in research’, ‘renewable energy sources’, ‘urban areas’, and ‘in the long run’.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures is generally controlled, although errors in articles, infinitive patterns, punctuation, and noun forms recur.
Check forms such as ‘discourage people from using’, ‘the rich’, ‘the government’s responsibility’, and remove the misplaced semicolon after ‘tax’.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
As the number of private cars has increased, so too has the level of pollution in many cities. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.