Some people argue that it is parents’ duty to teach their children to be good members of the society. Others, however, disagree with this statement and opine that children should learn this from their school and teachers should play the vital role to prepare them as ideal members of society. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
One of the most controversial issues today relates to whether parents or schoolteachersthe parents or teachers in the school have the responsibility to teach children to be good citizens. Therefore, we will examine both sides of the issueissues in this essay.
Undoubtedly, parents have an indispensable role in guiding their children when they are youngsmall onto the right path forto the right path towards their future lives. It is widely observedIt is proven that children are more influenced by their parents than by anyone elsethan anyone else. They will think that what their parents do is always right; thus,right, thus parents should beparents are advisable to be excellent role modelsan excellent role model for their children. Parents, for example, could teach them good moral valuesthe good moral values through storytelling. It is not only will benefit the individuals themselves but a society as well.
Nevertheless, teachers should fulfil their roledo their part well in school by teaching children what good values arethe children what are the good values. Children nowadays spend most of their daytime in school, so teachers have the primary responsibilitymost important obligation to make sure the children turn out to be well-behaved membersa well-behaved member of society. Teachers shouldIt is encouraged that teachers should punish students wheneverthe students whenever they make mistakes such as fighting in school. By doing this, the students will know that fighting is a bad behaviour and they may change their behaviourway of behavioural and it can also act as a deterrent to other students. Teachers can alsoBesides, teachers can also emphasise the importance of being a well-behaved individualgood individual in terms of behaviour while teaching.
In conclusion, both parents and teachers in the school are responsible for ensuring their children to behave mannerly when they are young.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response addresses both views in a clear, easy-to-follow structure and supports each side with relevant explanation and examples. Its main limitation is that the writer’s own position emerges only in the conclusion, while recurring awkward constructions reduce precision. State the balanced opinion in the introduction and revise sentence structures and collocations for consistently natural, accurate expression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed with relevant support, and a clear balanced opinion is given, although it appears only at the end.
State the personal position in the introduction and develop more precisely why the two influences should share responsibility.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically through distinct paragraphs, with generally clear linking between the two sides and the conclusion.
Use referencing and linking more naturally within sentences instead of relying heavily on overt transition markers.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary shows sufficient range for the topic, including some effective less-common terms, but several collocations and word forms are awkward.
Prioritise natural combinations such as good values, behavioural change, and behave well, checking word class as well as meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the argument clearly, though grammatical errors recur in clauses, agreement, and complementation.
Edit each complex sentence for complete clause structure and accurate verb patterns, especially after ensure, advise, and not only.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people argue that it is parents’ duty to teach their children to be good members of the society. Others, however, disagree with this statement and opine that children should learn this from their school and teachers should play the vital role to prepare them as ideal members of society. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.