More and more businesses as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating.
Sample Response
Technology is permeating every aspect of human lives. This is apparent in the way in which both individuals and corporations are increasingly using technology to communicate rather than relying on the conventional face to face interactions. The advantages and disadvantages of this development will be analysed in this essay.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use collective noun Original: human lives Suggested revision: human life Why it matters: “Human life” is the more natural collective expression in this general statement.
- 2. Reduce wordiness Original: in the way in which Suggested revision: in how Why it matters: The shorter phrase preserves the meaning and avoids a repetitive construction.
Suggested Rewrites
- human lives human life
- in the way in which in how
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response is concise and linguistically controlled, with accurate complex sentences and suitably formal vocabulary. However, it is only an introduction: it neither identifies nor develops any advantage or disadvantage and is 201 words below the expected minimum, so the task itself remains unanswered. The essential next step is to add separate body paragraphs explaining supported benefits and drawbacks, followed by a conclusion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response merely paraphrases the topic and announces an intention to discuss it, without presenting any advantage, disadvantage, or developed answer.
Write a complete response of at least 250 words that explains and supports multiple benefits and drawbacks of technology-mediated communication.
Coherence and Cohesion
The three sentences form a coherent introductory sequence, but there is no body development, paragraph progression, or completed argument to organise.
Build a clear four-paragraph structure with an introduction, one paragraph for advantages, one for disadvantages, and a conclusion.
Lexical Resource
The brief sample uses several appropriate formal terms accurately, but its extreme brevity provides limited evidence of the range needed for a full essay.
Extend the topic vocabulary through precise discussion of convenience, accessibility, efficiency, isolation, misunderstandings, and reduced non-verbal communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response contains accurate simple and complex sentences with good clause control, although the very short sample demonstrates only a limited structural range.
Maintain this accuracy while adding varied comparative, conditional, and cause-and-effect structures across a complete response.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
More and more businesses as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.