Internet technology means people do not need to travel to foreign countries to understand how others live. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
With the prevalence of the Internet, many people think that people do not need to travel to other countries to understand life there. I neither fully agree nor disagree with this opinion.
Why I partially agree with this statement is because people can watch documentaries online to understand how life is in foreign countries. These documentaries are often accurate and delivered with great quality, helping the audience understand the foreign cultures better. For example, Netflix recently has released a popular series depicting street food worldwide. Moreover, this option is suitable for those who have yet to be capable of international flights or people who only want a slight experience of multiple countries. For example, if a student is writing a paper on the difference between Asian cultures, he or she has to research online instead of traveling to said countries.
However, I partially disagree with the statement because mere research on the Internet cannot replace the traveling experience. Firstly, many features are exaggerated on camera for attention, whether that exaggeration is on the positive or negative side. For example, many foreigners usually film themselves eating bizarre foods from that country, leading viewers to misinterpret that most local people eat that way daily. Secondly, the Internet is full of unverifiable information, so information from Youtube channels or blogs might not be adequate to build a deep understanding of other cultures.
In conclusion, I do agree that using the Internet to learn about life in foreign countries instead of traveling is a feasible option for those who cannot afford the travel or do not have enough time. However, I do not think that the Internet can entirely replace going to other countries to experience their lives.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove double causation Original: Why I partially agree with this statement is because Suggested revision: I partially agree with this statement because Why it matters: Using both “why” and “because” creates a redundant causal structure.
- 2. Correct the collocation Original: delivered with great quality Suggested revision: produced to a high standard Why it matters: Documentaries are naturally described as being produced to a high standard.
- 3. Remove unnecessary article Original: the foreign cultures Suggested revision: foreign cultures Why it matters: The plural noun refers to cultures generally, so the definite article is unnecessary.
- 4. Place adverb correctly Original: recently has released Suggested revision: has recently released Why it matters: The frequency adverb normally follows the auxiliary in the present perfect.
- 5. Use natural wording Original: have yet to be capable of international flights Suggested revision: cannot yet travel internationally Why it matters: The original phrase incorrectly describes people as being capable of flights rather than capable of travelling.
- 6. Clarify limited exposure Original: a slight experience of multiple countries Suggested revision: limited exposure to multiple countries Why it matters: “Slight experience” is not a natural collocation for indirect familiarity with countries.
- 7. Use natural phrasing Original: the traveling experience Suggested revision: the experience of travelling Why it matters: The replacement is a more natural way to refer to first-hand travel.
- 8. Choose accurate noun Original: features Suggested revision: aspects Why it matters: “Aspects” appropriately refers to parts of life shown on camera, whereas “features” is imprecise here.
- 9. Express purpose clearly Original: for attention Suggested revision: to attract attention Why it matters: The infinitive phrase clearly and idiomatically expresses the purpose of the exaggeration.
- 10. Correct verb pattern Original: misinterpret that Suggested revision: mistakenly believe that Why it matters: “Misinterpret” normally takes an object, so it cannot directly introduce this content clause.
- 11. Correct brand spelling Original: Youtube Suggested revision: YouTube Why it matters: The platform name requires a capital Y and T.
- 12. Use accurate modality Original: has to research online Suggested revision: can conduct research online Why it matters: “Can” expresses online research as an available alternative rather than an unexplained obligation.
Suggested Rewrites
- Why I partially agree with this statement is because I partially agree with this statement because
- delivered with great quality produced to a high standard
- the foreign cultures foreign cultures
- recently has released has recently released
- have yet to be capable of international flights cannot yet travel internationally
- a slight experience of multiple countries limited exposure to multiple countries
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear, balanced position, with both the usefulness and limitations of online information developed through relevant examples. The main limitation is imprecise phrasing and several awkward collocations, which occasionally weaken otherwise clear ideas. The highest-priority improvement is to express the same arguments in more natural, precise language while sharpening the connection between each example and the degree of agreement.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the question fully, maintains a nuanced position, and supports both sides with relevant reasons and examples.
Explain more explicitly how each example determines the limits of what online research can replace.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure and clear contrast between the two sides create logical, easy-to-follow progression.
Use more varied internal links so the body paragraphs develop as connected arguments rather than sequences of points and examples.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the topic, but recurring awkward collocations reduce precision and naturalness.
Replace phrases such as delivered with great quality, slight experience, and misinterpret that with idiomatic academic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a good range of simple and complex sentences, with errors that rarely affect clarity.
Improve control of word order and verb patterns, particularly in phrases such as recently has released and have yet to be capable.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Internet technology means people do not need to travel to foreign countries to understand how others live. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.