Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a job. On the other hand, other people think getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Sample Response
There is ongoing debate about whether completing a university degree is the best way to obtain employment, or whether practical experience and soft skills matter more. Proponents of higher education claim that a university degree equips students with in-depth subject knowledge and professional qualifications. For example, graduates in fields such as engineering, law, and finance are often preferred by employers due to their formal credentials. Moreover, university programs foster analytical thinking and research skills, which are highly regarded in many workplaces.
Conversely, some argue that employers value practical experience and soft skills more than academic qualifications. Internships, part-time jobs, and volunteer work provide hands-on exposure and help develop communication, leadership, and teamwork abilities. In fast-paced or creative industries, practical competence often outweighs theoretical knowledge.
Personally, I believe that both approaches are important. While a degree provides essential knowledge and credibility, gaining experience and developing soft skills enhances employability and prepares candidates for real-world challenges. Combining education with practical exposure is therefore the most effective strategy for career success.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use direct academic wording Original: Proponents of higher education claim Suggested revision: Supporters of higher education argue Why it matters: The revision uses a more direct verb for presenting one side of a debate.
- 2. Clarify the educational agent Original: a university degree equips students with Suggested revision: university education provides students with Why it matters: The revision attributes the learning benefits to the educational experience more precisely.
- 3. Use a concise collocation Original: in-depth subject knowledge Suggested revision: specialist subject knowledge Why it matters: The replacement expresses advanced knowledge in a specific field more concisely.
- 4. Add useful precision Original: professional qualifications Suggested revision: recognised professional qualifications Why it matters: The modifier clarifies why these qualifications can carry weight with employers.
- 5. Use a measured claim Original: university programs foster Suggested revision: university study can develop Why it matters: The revision uses a natural collocation and avoids presenting the outcome as automatic.
- 6. Improve parallel phrasing Original: analytical thinking and research skills Suggested revision: analytical and research skills Why it matters: The parallel adjective structure makes the paired abilities more concise.
- 7. Use precise workplace language Original: highly regarded in many workplaces Suggested revision: highly valued in many professional settings Why it matters: The replacement describes employer valuation in more natural professional language.
- 8. Link the opposing group Original: some Suggested revision: others Why it matters: "Others" creates a more explicit contrast with the supporters discussed in the previous paragraph.
- 9. Use cautious comparison Original: often outweighs Suggested revision: can outweigh Why it matters: The modal expresses the context-dependent comparison without claiming an unsupported general frequency.
- 10. Sharpen the contrast Original: theoretical Suggested revision: academic Why it matters: The replacement creates a more precise contrast with workplace-based practical competence.
- 11. State the value precisely Original: both approaches are important Suggested revision: both approaches contribute to employability Why it matters: The revision ties the opinion directly to the employment outcome in the task.
- 12. Specify the credibility Original: essential knowledge and credibility Suggested revision: essential knowledge and professional credibility Why it matters: The added modifier clarifies the kind of credibility supplied by a degree.
Suggested Rewrites
- Proponents of higher education claim Supporters of higher education argue
- a university degree equips students with university education provides students with
- in-depth subject knowledge specialist subject knowledge
- professional qualifications recognised professional qualifications
- university programs foster university study can develop
- analytical thinking and research skills analytical and research skills
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is clearly organized and uses accurate, varied language to present both perspectives and a consistent balanced opinion. Its central weakness is limited development: at only 168 words, the discussion relies on brief assertions and broad examples, especially for the practical-experience side. The priority is to expand each position with a fuller causal explanation and a specific, developed example while retaining the concise structure.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear balanced opinion are addressed, but the substantially under-length response develops its supporting ideas only briefly.
Expand each viewpoint with a complete chain of reasoning and a specific example to meet the expected task depth.
Coherence and Cohesion
The three-paragraph structure creates clear progression, and cohesive devices connect the contrasting positions smoothly.
Use a separate introductory paragraph and develop the practical-experience discussion more fully to improve structural balance.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied, precise, and appropriately formal, with strong control of employment-related collocations.
Add more topic-specific language when extending the examples so the lexical precision is sustained in greater depth.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of simple and complex structures is used accurately, with consistently clear sentence control.
Preserve this accuracy while using more complex cause-and-effect structures to develop the supporting arguments.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a job. On the other hand, other people think getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.