Nowadays, many university graduates are unemployed despite having a degree. What problems do this cause? What are some possible solutions?
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Sample Response
Nowadays, a large number of university graduates cannot find a job despite holding a degree. This situation causes several serious problems, but some effective solutions can be implemented to address itapplied to solve it.
From one perspective,On the one hand, unemployment among graduates leads to negative consequences. First, it creates a heavy financial burden onfor young people and their families. Studying at university incurs significant expensescosts a lot of money, so being unemployed makes it difficult for graduates to earn a living. As a result, many of them feel stressed and lose confidence. Second, this trend causes a waste of human resources for society. When educated people cannot work, the country misses out on valuable skills and knowledge that could help the economy grow.
Nevertheless,On the other hand, there are practical solutions to tackle this issue. To begin with, universities should update their training programs to focus more on practical skills. For example, higher education institutionsschools can teach students soft skills, computer skills, and English, which are essential for many modern jobs. In addition, students themselves need to be more proactive. They should apply for internships or part-time jobs during their studies to gain real working experience.
In conclusion, the lack of jobs for university graduates causes financial stress and wastes valuablesocietal talent. However, this problem can be mitigated if universities provide practical training and students actively build their own experience.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay clearly addresses both the causes and solutions of graduate unemployment with a logical structure and natural, accurate language control. The main limitation is that the essay is slightly under the expected length of 250 words, which restricts the depth of idea development. To improve, extend each body paragraph by providing more detailed explanations or concrete examples to reach the full word count.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers both parts of the prompt directly, but the ideas are developed only briefly due to the response falling below the recommended length.
Elaborate on each main point with extra supporting sentences or real-world examples to meet the required word count.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is clear and information flows logically throughout the essay with appropriate transition words.
Use a wider variety of cohesive devices beyond standard structural markers to make transitions feel more seamless.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is used accurately and flexibly with well-chosen collocations relevant to the topic.
Incorporate a broader range of less common topical vocabulary and idiomatic phrases to demonstrate higher flexibility.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Sentence structures show good control with a mix of simple and complex sentences and almost no grammatical errors.
Introduce more sophisticated complex structures, such as inversion or reduced clauses, to enhance grammatical variety.