Some universities require students to take classes in many subjects. Other universities require students to specialize in one subject. Which one is better?
Sample Response
I think the issue about what is better to specialise in many subjects or choose the one is a controversial one. Each option has its own advantages and disadvantages. Some people prefer to specialise in one subject and know it very well. However, others prefer to extend their range of interests and specialise in many subjects but not in detail. Bellow I will give reasons to support my position. From the one side, learning something in detail brings many benefits. First of all, people gain more knowledge and experience in this area. So, after graduation, they are well prepared for their further career in this field. Second, they do not spend their precious time on other subjects. This gives them the opportunity to focus on one subject. From the other side, people who specialise in many subjects have more options to choose from. For example, if a person does not make a decision about what he is going to do after graduation it is a very good chance for him to try many fields of study and make the right decision. In addition to this practical benefit, a person has the opportunity to extend his range of interests, his communication skills and have better conceptions of things around. Also, a person has a better chance to choose what he really likes to do and make self-realization. To sum up, I think that every person should have a chance to choose. Does he want to specialise in one subject or he wants to take classes in many subjects?
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use accurate study verb Original: specialise in many subjects but not in detail Suggested revision: study many subjects but in less detail Why it matters: “Specialise” means concentrating on a narrow field, so it conflicts with studying many subjects.
- 2. Correct spelling Original: Bellow Suggested revision: Below Why it matters: “Below” is the correct spelling of the linking adverb.
- 3. Fix contrast linker Original: From the one side Suggested revision: On the one hand Why it matters: The standard paired expression is “on the one hand ... on the other hand”.
- 4. Name the subject clearly Original: learning something in detail Suggested revision: studying one subject in detail Why it matters: The revision makes the intended contrast with studying many subjects explicit.
- 5. Clarify reference Original: this area Suggested revision: that subject Why it matters: “That subject” refers more precisely to the field being studied in depth.
- 6. Use formal result linker Original: So, Suggested revision: As a result, Why it matters: This linker makes the cause-and-effect relationship explicit in a formal register.
- 7. Correct collocation Original: their further career Suggested revision: their future career Why it matters: “Future career” is the appropriate expression for employment after graduation.
- 8. Use parallel sequencing Original: Second, Suggested revision: Secondly, Why it matters: “Secondly” matches the earlier sequencing phrase “First of all”.
- 9. Avoid loaded wording Original: their precious time Suggested revision: their time Why it matters: “Precious” adds unnecessary emotional emphasis to a neutral comparison of study choices.
- 10. Fix paired linker Original: From the other side Suggested revision: On the other hand Why it matters: This is the conventional counterpart to “on the one hand”.
- 11. Use accurate study verb Original: people who specialise in many subjects Suggested revision: people who study many subjects Why it matters: Students can study a broad range, but “specialise” normally describes a narrow focus.
- 12. Use natural verb form Original: does not make a decision about Suggested revision: has not decided Why it matters: The present perfect form naturally expresses a decision that remains unresolved.
Suggested Rewrites
- specialise in many subjects but not in detail study many subjects but in less detail
- Bellow Below
- From the one side On the one hand
- learning something in detail studying one subject in detail
- this area that subject
- So, As a result,
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response's strongest feature is its balanced explanation of the practical value of both specialisation and broader study. However, its position is delayed until the ending, development is fairly general, and the entire essay is presented as one paragraph, while awkward phrasing and grammatical errors recur. Prioritise stating the qualified position early, organising each option into a distinct paragraph, and supporting the final judgement with a sharper comparison.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
Both educational approaches are relevantly discussed, and the conclusion offers a qualified preference for individual choice, though this position emerges late.
State the qualified position in the introduction and justify it through an explicit comparison of when each approach is preferable.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a recognisable two-sided progression, but mechanical signposting and the absence of paragraph breaks weaken organisation.
Use separate introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs, with one focused body paragraph for each educational approach.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for discussing education and choice, but spelling errors and several unnatural collocations limit precision.
Use natural phrases such as broaden one's interests and achieve self-realisation, and proofread basic spelling carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex structures, but errors in articles, coordination, clause structure, and question formation are noticeable.
Practise forming controlled comparative statements and indirect questions while checking articles and parallel verb forms.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some universities require students to take classes in many subjects. Other universities require students to specialize in one subject. Which one is better?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.