Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
People have different views about whether university students should learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. In my opinion, the diversity of undergraduates' curricula is more beneficial to their sustainable development.
There are two main reasons why it can be arguedwhy it be argued that university students should focus on their main subjects. Firstly, most of the majors require their students to pay all their attention to themit, which means the students do not have extra time to learn about other subjects. For example, many science subjects like physics or mathematics are too difficult for most studentsmost of the students to understand. If they learn about other subjects which have no relation to these subjects, they may fail to pass the exams. Secondly, different subjects need different methods to study them well, and sometimes they may negatively affect each other. This means students need to improve a certain way of thinking instead of mixing different ways together.
However, I would agree with those who believe that university students should broaden their horizons and knowledge by learning other subjects. It is true that they should spend most of their time on their majors, but sometimes focusing endlessly on the same topicsparing on the same topic may make people more confused. Different subjects could bring students different views. For instance, many scientists say music is a good way to stimulate their creativity and inspire new ideasopen their minds and bring them some ideas. Furthermore, students' future careerscareer are not only connectednot only just connected with their majors, but also related to many other qualities like social skills.
In conclusion, while some people believe that university students should pay all their attention to their main subjectspay all their attention to main subjects, my own view is that they should also learn other subjects, which benefits their sustainable development.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay addresses all parts of the prompt with a clear personal position and logical progression of ideas. However, the supporting points could be further developed with deeper explanation and more precise real-world examples. To reach a higher score, focus on eliminating minor grammatical errors and refining vocabulary choices for greater precision.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both perspectives are discussed and a clear position is maintained throughout the response.
Provide more fully extended and concrete real-world examples to support main ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs with clear topic sentences and smooth transitions.
Use a wider variety of cohesive devices to avoid overusing basic linkers like 'firstly' and 'secondly'.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of vocabulary suited to the topic, though some word choices are slightly imprecise.
Focus on accurate collocation and word choice, such as replacing 'sparing on the same topic' with clearer phrasing like 'focusing exclusively on one discipline'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentence structures is used, but occasional grammatical errors are present.
Review subject-verb agreement and noun pluralization, such as in 'it be argued' and 'future career are'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.