What are the pros and cons of watching TV for children?
Sample Response
Nowadays every person keep TV at home to entertain himself and his family. Children watch TV more and more everyday. The mostly children watch cartoons and other kids stuff. However, there are both advantages and disadvantages of watching TV for children. I'll discuss pros and cons of watching TV for children. Lets begin by looking at some of pros of watching TV for children. One of main benefit of watching for children is that they learn new things everyday like I'm giving you example about myself when i was kid, we used to watch Meena cartoons, they were very popular at that time. We learnt lesson that the girls should go to school like boys do. One other advantage of watching TV for children is that they don't get bored of watching TV like mostly children annoys their parents, so the parents tell them to watch TV, then parents feel comfortable. After discussed some main benefits of watching TV for children now lets consider some drawbacks of watching TV for children. One of problem is that they got addict to TV like when their parents tell them to do their homework, they don't listen and when parent switch off the TV, then they cry and annoy his parents, so parent feel unhappy. One more disadvantage is that its effect on children eye sight. Doctors says that watching TV is not good for eye sight specially for young children. to sum up there are both positives and negatives of watching TV for children. I would suggest that this is bad habit, parents should avoid this. They give some toys, so they can play with them and spend time with them, it's good for children and parents too.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix agreement and article Original: every person keep TV Suggested revision: most people keep a TV Why it matters: Use a plural subject with its matching verb and add the article before the countable noun.
- 2. Add missing article Original: this is bad habit Suggested revision: this is a bad habit Why it matters: The singular countable noun “habit” requires an article.
- 3. Fix determiner form Original: The mostly children Suggested revision: Most children Why it matters: Use “most” directly before the plural noun without an article.
- 4. Use formal wording Original: other kids stuff Suggested revision: other children's programmes Why it matters: This replacement is more precise and appropriately formal for an essay.
- 5. Add apostrophe Original: Lets Suggested revision: Let's Why it matters: The contraction of “let us” requires an apostrophe.
- 6. Add missing article Original: some of pros Suggested revision: some of the pros Why it matters: The definite article is needed before this specified plural noun.
- 7. Fix noun phrase Original: One of main benefit Suggested revision: One of the main benefits Why it matters: The structure “one of” requires “the” followed by a plural noun.
- 8. Name the activity Original: watching for children Suggested revision: watching TV for children Why it matters: The object “TV” is needed to make the activity clear.
- 9. Correct example phrase Original: new things everyday like I'm giving you example about myself Suggested revision: new things every day. For example, from my own experience, Why it matters: This revision corrects “every day” and introduces the personal example with a complete, grammatical phrase.
- 10. Fix capitalization and article Original: when i was kid Suggested revision: when I was a child Why it matters: The pronoun “I” must be capitalized and the singular countable noun needs an article.
- 11. Add missing article Original: We learnt lesson Suggested revision: We learnt the lesson Why it matters: The specific lesson learned from the programme requires the definite article.
- 12. Use gerund after preposition Original: discussed Suggested revision: discussing Why it matters: The preposition “after” should be followed by the gerund form here.
Suggested Rewrites
- every person keep TV most people keep a TV
- this is bad habit this is a bad habit
- The mostly children Most children
- other kids stuff other children's programmes
- Lets Let's
- some of pros some of the pros
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response covers both advantages and disadvantages and supports them with recognisable examples, so its central message remains clear. Its main weakness is pervasive inaccuracy in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and word forms, compounded by repetitive wording and single-block organisation. The highest priority is to build shorter, correctly controlled sentences and organise each main point in a separate paragraph before adding further detail.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both sides and supplies relevant examples, though several points remain simple or loosely explained.
Develop each advantage and disadvantage by explaining a clear consequence rather than moving quickly to another example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The advantages and disadvantages follow a recognisable sequence, but transitions are mechanical and the response lacks effective paragraphing.
Separate the introduction, each side, and the conclusion into focused paragraphs linked by clear reference words.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary communicates the topic but relies heavily on repeated words and includes frequent awkward or inaccurate choices.
Replace repeated phrases about watching TV with precise topic vocabulary and check collocations related to addiction and eyesight.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, pronouns, and sentence boundaries reduce control and sometimes strain readability.
Practise writing and checking shorter clauses for correct subject-verb agreement, articles, tense, and pronoun reference.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
What are the pros and cons of watching TV for children?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.