You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter: - describe the problem with the equipment - explain how this problem is affecting your work - say what you want the shop or company to do
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, Three months ago, I purchased a Dell laptop from your store. Unfortunately, the device has suddenly stopped working and is now totally unusable. I really need this laptop to complete my work as I work from home, and I am hoping that you will repair or replace it soon. In relation to the specifics of the problem, the laptop screen does not show anything except a black screen with some red dots on it. It worked just fine the day before yesterday but is dysfunctional right now. I have checked the battery and power connection, and also tried to realise the problem from the sound of the laptop. But I could not find any solid reason. For your kind information, my purchase number is 2558745, and I am attaching a copy of my receipt with this letter. I am a freelancer and have a few running projects that I need to finish before the end of this month. If my laptop does not work, I am unable to work. Besides, I have important files, software and in-progress project instructions on this laptop which means I am stuck without them. Since I have a valid warranty, and I need this device to be fixed immediately, I am hoping that you would repair it within the next three days or replace it with a new one and transfer the data. I hope to hear from you soon. Yours faithfully, Monica Smith
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Separate the salutation Original: Dear Sir or Madam, Three months ago Suggested revision: Dear Sir or Madam, Three months ago Why it matters: A formal letter should begin its message on a new line after the salutation.
- 2. Remove redundancy Original: totally unusable Suggested revision: unusable Why it matters: “Unusable” already conveys complete inability to use the laptop.
- 3. Use professional tone Original: I really need this laptop Suggested revision: I rely on this laptop Why it matters: The replacement states the work dependency more formally and precisely.
- 4. Use concise transition Original: In relation to the specifics of the problem Suggested revision: More specifically Why it matters: The shorter transition introduces the technical details directly.
- 5. Clarify screen display Original: does not show anything except Suggested revision: shows only Why it matters: The original construction is unnecessarily contradictory because the screen does display a black image and red dots.
- 6. Tighten fault description Original: black screen with some red dots on it Suggested revision: black screen with red dots Why it matters: The shorter phrase preserves the specific symptom without filler.
- 7. Use formal wording Original: just fine the day before yesterday Suggested revision: normally two days ago Why it matters: The replacement is more concise and appropriate for a complaint letter.
- 8. Use natural phrasing Original: dysfunctional right now Suggested revision: not functioning now Why it matters: This is the more natural description of a device that has stopped working.
- 9. Choose accurate verb Original: realise Suggested revision: identify Why it matters: “Identify” means determine the source of a technical fault; “realise” does not.
- 10. Clarify diagnostic action Original: from the sound of the laptop Suggested revision: by listening to the laptop Why it matters: The replacement states how the writer attempted to identify the fault.
- 11. Use professional phrase Original: For your kind information Suggested revision: For reference Why it matters: “For reference” is concise and suitably formal in customer correspondence.
- 12. Use correct collocation Original: a few running projects Suggested revision: several ongoing projects Why it matters: Projects are conventionally described as “ongoing,” not “running,” in this context.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Sir or Madam, Three months ago Dear Sir or Madam, Three months ago
- totally unusable unusable
- I really need this laptop I rely on this laptop
- In relation to the specifics of the problem More specifically
- does not show anything except shows only
- black screen with some red dots on it black screen with red dots
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter achieves its purpose convincingly by describing the laptop fault, explaining the immediate effect on freelance projects, and requesting a time-bound repair or replacement under warranty. Its main limitations are the absence of clear paragraph breaks and several unnatural expressions that make an otherwise formal message sound less polished. Prioritise grouping the three requested functions into separate paragraphs and replacing imprecise diagnostic and workplace phrases with natural alternatives.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully addressed with specific, relevant detail, and the firm but courteous request is appropriate for a supplier.
Keep the requested remedy focused by clarifying whether data transfer is required for both repair and replacement options.
Coherence and Cohesion
The ideas follow a logical sequence from the fault to its impact and the requested remedy, although the single-block format reduces readability.
Use separate paragraphs for the equipment problem, the effect on work, and the warranty-based action requested.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of relevant complaint and work vocabulary, but several collocations such as realise the problem and running projects are unnatural.
Use diagnose the fault, ongoing projects, determine the cause, and work files to express these ideas more precisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex sentences is generally well controlled, with occasional problems in conditional tense, modal choice, and punctuation.
Use a consistent present condition and request form, such as Without the laptop, I cannot work and I would be grateful if you could repair it.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter:
- describe the problem with the equipment
- explain how this problem is affecting your work
- say what you want the shop or company to do
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.