The chart below gives information about the amount of time children spend with their parents.
Sample Response
The stacked bar charts delineate how much time children of various age groups spend with their parents. The initial impression from the charts is that whilst children spend more time with both parents at weekends, mothers allocate more time for child-rearing during weekdays. It can also be seen across the two charts that fathers (excluding the ‘with both’ classification) generally spent the least time with their children.
During weekdays, babies aged from 0 to 1 years spent the least amount of time (2 hours) with the fathers, the most time with the mothers (roughly 5.8 hours), and around 1.2 hours with both. Similar pictures are evident in the remaining age groups; around 1.5-2 hours are spent with the fathers, approximately 6 hours with the mothers, and 1-2 hours with both.
A relatively different pattern could be observed regarding the child-rearing time at weekends. Across the age brackets, the fathers still set aside the least time with their kids (only a negligible 0.25-0.5 hours), mom’s time allocation is around 3-4 hours, and both parents together put from 5 to 6 hours into caring for child kids.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Keep present tense Original: spent Suggested revision: spend Why it matters: Use the present tense consistently when describing what the charts show.
- 2. Use concise age range Original: babies aged from 0 to 1 years Suggested revision: children aged 0–1 Why it matters: This is a more concise and natural description of the chart's age category.
- 3. Use data vocabulary Original: pictures Suggested revision: patterns Why it matters: Patterns is the appropriate word for comparable trends across age groups.
- 4. Correct weekday range Original: around 1.5-2 hours are spent with the fathers Suggested revision: around 0.8–2 hours are spent with fathers Why it matters: The weekday bars for fathers range from roughly 0.8 to 2 hours across the remaining groups.
- 5. Correct combined range Original: 1-2 hours with both Suggested revision: about 1–2.5 hours with both parents Why it matters: Some weekday combined-parent segments reach approximately 2.5 hours.
- 6. Use direct phrasing Original: A relatively different pattern could be observed Suggested revision: A different pattern is evident Why it matters: The revision is clearer, more concise, and consistent with chart-reporting tense.
- 7. Correct weekend range Original: only a negligible 0.25-0.5 hours Suggested revision: approximately 0.25–1.75 hours Why it matters: Weekend time with fathers varies more widely and reaches about 1.75 hours for ages 4–5.
- 8. Use formal term Original: mom’s time allocation Suggested revision: mothers’ time allocation Why it matters: Mothers is more formal and matches the terminology used elsewhere in the response.
- 9. Correct range and wording Original: put from 5 to 6 hours into caring for child kids Suggested revision: spend about 5–6.5 hours with their children Why it matters: The weekend combined-parent segments reach roughly 6.5 hours, and the original wording is ungrammatical.
Suggested Rewrites
- spent spend
- babies aged from 0 to 1 years children aged 0–1
- pictures patterns
- around 1.5-2 hours are spent with the fathers around 0.8–2 hours are spent with fathers
- 1-2 hours with both about 1–2.5 hours with both parents
- A relatively different pattern could be observed A different pattern is evident
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response provides a clear overview and an effective weekday-versus-weekend structure, accurately capturing the dominant roles of mothers on weekdays and both parents at weekends. The main weakness is imprecise reporting of several component values, particularly fathers’ weekend time across age groups; prioritise checking the full range of bars and supporting each overview point with representative, accurate comparisons.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The key weekday and weekend patterns are selected clearly, but some ranges are inaccurate, most notably the stated 0.25–0.5 weekend hours with fathers.
Check each age-group segment before generalising and cite representative exceptions, such as the higher father-only figure for children aged 4–5 at weekends.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organised into overview, weekday detail, and weekend detail, with clear progression between the two charts.
Make the final comparison easier to follow by separating the three parent categories into two well-linked sentences.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific language describes allocation and patterns, though informal or awkward choices such as “mom” and “caring for child kids” reduce precision.
Maintain a formal register and edit for collocation and repetition, using consistent terms such as “mothers,” “fathers,” and “children.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex sentences are generally well controlled, although the final sentence has faulty coordination and an inaccurate noun phrase.
Avoid joining several independent comparisons with commas; use separate sentences or controlled parallel clauses for clearer grammar.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below gives information about the amount of time children spend with their parents.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.