The graph below shows the daily consumption of three spreads per person from 1981 to 2007 in a country.
Sample Response
The line graph compares daily consumptionper day consumption of three spreads:three different spreads - margarine, low-fat and reduced-fat spreads, and butter'margarine', 'low fat & reduced spreads', and 'butter' in a country between 1981 and 2007. Daily consumption per personDaily per person consumption has been measured in grams. Overall, the consumption of all spreads declined significantly from 1981 to 2007 with the exception of low fat & reduced spreads. In detailLooking into detail, butter was the most widely consumed spreadmost preferred spread with about 140 grams per person per day141 grams per day per person consumption in 1981. Consumption of margarine and low fat & reduced spreads was 99 grams and just 10 grams, respectively, in the same year. While butter consumption droppedthe consumption of butter and dropped sharply after 1986remarkably afterwards, people started to consume less margarineless amount of margarine as well. However, the intake of low fat and reduced spreads increased drastically and peaked at 80 gramsreached the peak of 80 grams in 2001, and low-fat and reduced-fat spreads were the most consumed category in 2007and became the most consumed spread in 2007. The consumption of butter and margarine decreased dramatically over the 26-year periodover a period of 28 years. In detaildetails, butterbutter’s consumption rose steadily and touched a high of 160 grams per person in 1986170 grams per capita in 1986, but after that, it decreased continuously and reached nearly 55 grams by 2007. Similarly, margarine showed the same trend with some fluctuations, decreasing from 100 grams to 80 grams between 1979 and 2007.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response supplies a useful overview and communicates the broad decline in butter and margarine alongside the rise of low-fat spreads. Its effectiveness is limited by several serious inaccuracies: low-fat spreads did not appear until 1996, butter peaked at about 160 grams, and margarine ended near 40 rather than 80 grams. The priority is to verify dates and endpoints before describing each series.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main overall trends are identified, but invented early data for low-fat spreads and inaccurate peak, endpoint, and date information substantially reduce factual reliability.
Report low-fat spreads only from 1996 and correct the key endpoints, especially margarine at about 40 grams and butter at about 50 grams in 2007.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses from an overview to details in a generally logical way, though repeated statements about decline and a contradictory account of butter weaken cohesion.
Group the two declining spreads together in one paragraph and describe the later-introduced low-fat spread separately to avoid repetition and contradiction.
Lexical Resource
A reasonably wide range of trend language is used, but some choices are awkward or imprecise, including "per day consumption," "less amount," and "In details."
Prefer precise forms such as "daily consumption," "less margarine," and "In detail," while reserving dramatic adverbs for changes that justify them.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied sentence forms, but errors in clause construction, articles, and punctuation are noticeable, most clearly in "the consumption of butter and dropped."
Proofread each complex sentence for a complete subject-verb structure and remove unnecessary commas before coordinated verbs.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the daily consumption of three spreads per person from 1981 to 2007 in a country.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.