The average prices per kilometre of clothing imported into the European Union from six different countries in 1993 and 2003 are shown in the bar chart below.
Sample Response
The column graph compares the import prices of per kilometre clothing by the European Union from six different countries in 1993 with that of 2003. Overall, the EU paid the highest amount to Argentina for garments import and lowest to Bangladesh in both years. As is seen, the European Union paid around 28 pounds for per kilometre clothes from Argentina in 1993 and this rate was highest. After ten years, it reduced to just over 25 pounds but still, Argentina received the premier price for clothing export to the EU. The second most value paid by the EU for cloth importing from Brazil and both in 1993 and 2003 they were paid roughly 23 pounds for the one-kilometre dress. Japan received exactly 15 pounds for that in 1993 but this rate dropped to roughly 13 pounds after 10 years. China was paid 10 pounds for each kilo costume the EU exported in 1993 and the price hiked to about 17 pounds in just ten years. The EU purchased Indian garments items for approximately 7 pounds a kilo in 1993 and the price doubled in a decade. The least amount for per kilo clothing was paid to Bangladesh by the EU in both of the years but the price went high in 2003 and was 6 pounds compared to half of that in a decade earlier.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use noun modifier Original: garments import Suggested revision: garment imports Why it matters: “Garment imports” is the natural noun phrase for imported clothing.
- 2. Add the article Original: and lowest to Bangladesh Suggested revision: and the lowest to Bangladesh Why it matters: The parallel superlative phrase requires the definite article.
- 3. Clarify the unit Original: for per kilometre clothes Suggested revision: per kilometre of clothing Why it matters: This revision expresses the chart’s stated unit more clearly.
- 4. Use chart terminology Original: this rate was highest Suggested revision: this was the highest figure Why it matters: A plotted price is more accurately described as a figure than a rate.
- 5. Use intransitive verb Original: reduced Suggested revision: fell Why it matters: “Reduce” is normally transitive here, whereas “fell” correctly describes the decrease.
- 6. Use precise comparison Original: premier Suggested revision: highest Why it matters: “Highest price” directly and accurately expresses the ranking.
- 7. Use plural exports Original: export Suggested revision: exports Why it matters: The general trade category is naturally expressed in the plural.
- 8. Replace vague reference Original: for that in 1993 Suggested revision: per kilometre in 1993 Why it matters: The explicit unit removes the vague pronoun reference.
- 9. Match chart wording Original: each kilo costume Suggested revision: each kilometre of clothing Why it matters: The response should use the visual’s unit and the uncountable noun “clothing.”
- 10. Correct trade direction Original: exported Suggested revision: imported Why it matters: The chart concerns clothing imported into the EU, not clothing exported by it.
- 11. Use formal trend verb Original: hiked Suggested revision: rose Why it matters: “Rose” is the appropriate formal verb for an increase in a statistical report.
- 12. Remove redundant noun Original: garments items Suggested revision: garments Why it matters: “Garments” already means clothing items, so the second noun is redundant.
Suggested Rewrites
- garments import garment imports
- and lowest to Bangladesh and the lowest to Bangladesh
- for per kilometre clothes per kilometre of clothing
- this rate was highest this was the highest figure
- reduced fell
- premier highest
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response covers all six countries, accurately reports the main values and changes, and clearly identifies Argentina and Bangladesh as the extremes. Its chief limitation is frequent imprecise wording and sentence-level awkwardness, including confused import and export direction and unnatural clothing terms, while the overview could better summarise which prices rose, fell, or stayed stable. Prioritise precise comparative language and a fuller trend overview.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
All six countries are covered with generally accurate figures, and the highest and lowest prices are clearly identified.
Extend the overview to state that prices rose for China, India, and Bangladesh, fell for Argentina and Japan, and remained stable for Brazil.
Coherence and Cohesion
The country-by-country sequence is easy to follow, but the single-block structure and some unclear references limit cohesion.
Group falling or stable prices separately from rising prices and use explicit comparative references.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a useful range of price and clothing vocabulary, but inaccurate collocations occur frequently.
Use consistent terms such as clothing, price per kilogram, imported from, rose, and fell rather than costume, dress, or premier price.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning remains mostly clear, but recurring problems with sentence construction, articles, agreement, and passive forms reduce accuracy.
Rewrite incomplete or overloaded clauses with clear subjects, especially the Brazil comparison and the sentence describing China.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The average prices per kilometre of clothing imported into the European Union from six different countries in 1993 and 2003 are shown in the bar chart below.
Your response
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