The following bar chart shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000.
Sample Response
The bar chart depicts the diverse type of transportation utilizes for commuting from the workplace in Europe in three decades.
Most of the people use pedestrians in 1960, which was only 2 percent less who were using car in 2000. After two-decade, almost half the people who were using feet for travel started using other modes. In 2000 there were only 10 percent people who were walker. Whereas, In 1980 there were exactly 25 percent individuals who were using their car. Which was only 7 before two decades.
Furthermore, Fluctuation has been noticed in the use of busses which was inclined in 1980, and it again decreased by 10 percent in 2000. On the other hand, Most people prefer to use their two-wheeler in 1960, which decreased up to 5 percent within twenty years. A sudden fall has been noticed in the ratio who operated bikes that were equal to the ratio using the car in 1960.
Overall, the usage of bikes was observed has been to fall with time. Whereas, preference for cars was increased by the time. On the other hand, people who travel by bus have almost remained the same even after forty years.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix plural noun Original: After two-decade Suggested revision: After two decades Why it matters: A plural time period requires the plural noun 'decades'.
- 2. Add proportion marker Original: 10 percent people Suggested revision: 10% of people Why it matters: A percentage before a noun requires 'of'.
- 3. Fix word form Original: who were walker Suggested revision: who walked Why it matters: The plural subject needs a verb rather than the singular noun 'walker'.
- 4. Remove sentence fragment Original: Whereas, In Suggested revision: In Why it matters: 'Whereas' cannot stand alone before this independent statement.
- 5. Simplify percentage structure Original: there were exactly 25 percent individuals who were using their car Suggested revision: exactly 25% of people travelled by car Why it matters: The revision uses a grammatical percentage phrase and a concise transport collocation.
- 6. Repair sentence opening Original: Which was only 7 Suggested revision: This figure was only 7% Why it matters: A demonstrative noun phrase creates an independent sentence and identifies the value clearly.
- 7. Use time reference Original: before two decades Suggested revision: two decades earlier Why it matters: 'Earlier' correctly expresses the relationship between 1960 and 1980.
- 8. Use direct reporting Original: Fluctuation has been noticed in the use of busses Suggested revision: bus use fluctuated Why it matters: The direct active construction is concise and grammatically complete.
- 9. Describe change accurately Original: which was inclined in 1980, and it again decreased by 10 percent Suggested revision: , increasing in 1980 before decreasing by 10 percentage points Why it matters: 'Increase' describes an upward value, and the chart's change is measured in percentage points.
- 10. Correct bicycle figure Original: Most people prefer to use their two-wheeler Suggested revision: about 27% of people used bicycles Why it matters: Bicycles accounted for about 27% in 1960 and were not used by a majority.
- 11. State exact decrease Original: which decreased up to 5 percent Suggested revision: a figure that decreased by 5 percentage points Why it matters: Use 'by' for the size of a fall and distinguish percentage points from percent.
- 12. Fix verb structure Original: usage of bikes was observed has been to fall Suggested revision: use of bicycles fell Why it matters: The revision removes the conflicting passive and perfect verb forms.
Suggested Rewrites
- After two-decade After two decades
- 10 percent people 10% of people
- who were walker who walked
- Whereas, In In
- there were exactly 25 percent individuals who were using their car exactly 25% of people travelled by car
- Which was only 7 This figure was only 7%
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response identifies the broad rise in car use and falls in cycling and walking, and it includes several relevant figures. However, frequent grammatical and word-choice errors make comparisons awkward or unclear, while the overview omits the major decline in walking. Prioritise accurate sentence structures and transport vocabulary so that each trend and comparison can be understood immediately.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Several main trends and values are accurate, but the overview omits walking and some comparisons are insufficiently clear or fully developed.
State all dominant changes in the overview, especially the sharp fall in walking and the strong rise in car use, then support them systematically.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a recognisable structure and groups some modes together, but fragments and mechanical linkers interrupt progression.
Use complete sentences and organise the details by increasing modes versus decreasing modes instead of repeatedly adding contrast markers.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant transport and trend vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate choices such as 'use pedestrians,' 'inclined,' and 'operated bikes' cause difficulty.
Learn and apply standard combinations such as 'travelled on foot,' 'rose,' 'fell,' and 'cycled to work.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and clause construction reduce clarity despite attempts at complex forms.
Build complete subject-verb sentences first and check agreement and comparison patterns before adding subordinate clauses.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The following bar chart shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.