The graphs below show the global robotics market during 2000 and 2025 based on sectors.
Sample Response
The given bar charts illustrate the global sales market in robotics and consider four sectors during 2000 and 2025.
Overall, it is seen from the first graph that sales are rising in 2025 as compared to 2000, however, in the industrial sector, the sales are increasing in 2025 as compared to the other sectors, which is also true in 2000.
In the personal sector, the size of the global robotic market rose from 1 billion dollars in 2005 and will rise in 2025 to 9 billion dollars. In addition, the global market has increased in 2020 by 10 billion dollars and shall rise by 2025 approximately 16 billion dollars.
Furthermore, in the industrial sector, the global size for the market in 2000 was 4 billion dollars and continues to increase in 2020 by 16 billion dollars and will continue to increase in 2025 as compared to others. In the military sector, the market was at 2 billion dollars in 2000, which surged to 10 billion dollars in 2010 and also will rise in 2025 by 15 billion dollars.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Identify visuals accurately Original: bar charts Suggested revision: bar chart and table Why it matters: The prompt contains one bar chart for the total market and one table for sector data.
- 2. Use precise subject Original: global sales market in robotics Suggested revision: size of the global robotics market Why it matters: This wording accurately names the monetary market-size measure shown.
- 3. Correct time preposition Original: during Suggested revision: between Why it matters: Between is required when naming the two endpoints of a period.
- 4. Use accurate reporting verb Original: consider Suggested revision: show Why it matters: The visuals show sector data; they do not themselves consider the sectors.
- 5. Name sector and value Original: the global market has increased in 2020 by 10 billion dollars Suggested revision: the commercial market is projected to reach $10 billion in 2020 Why it matters: The 10-billion figure belongs to the commercial sector and is a market level, not an increase.
- 6. Correct value phrasing Original: shall rise by 2025 approximately 16 billion dollars Suggested revision: is expected to reach approximately $16 billion by 2025 Why it matters: The table shows a 2025 level of 16 billion dollars rather than a rise of that amount.
- 7. Use natural collocation Original: global size for the market Suggested revision: market size Why it matters: Market size is the standard concise expression for this measure.
- 8. Format currency concisely Original: was 4 billion dollars Suggested revision: was $4 billion Why it matters: This is the conventional concise form for a value in billions of dollars.
- 9. Correct industrial value Original: continues to increase in 2020 by 16 billion dollars Suggested revision: is projected to reach $16 billion in 2020 Why it matters: Sixteen billion is the industrial sector's level in 2020, not the amount of its increase.
- 10. State largest sector Original: will continue to increase in 2025 as compared to others Suggested revision: is expected to remain the largest sector at $26 billion in 2025 Why it matters: The table shows both the industrial sector's 2025 value and its leading position.
- 11. Use concise value form Original: was at 2 billion dollars Suggested revision: was $2 billion Why it matters: The shorter form is more natural when reporting a market value.
- 12. Correct year and value Original: which surged to 10 billion dollars in 2010 Suggested revision: and is projected to reach $10 billion in 2020 Why it matters: The military sector is worth $4 billion in 2010 and reaches $10 billion in 2020.
Suggested Rewrites
- bar charts bar chart and table
- global sales market in robotics size of the global robotics market
- during between
- consider show
- the global market has increased in 2020 by 10 billion dollars the commercial market is projected to reach $10 billion in 2020
- shall rise by 2025 approximately 16 billion dollars is expected to reach approximately $16 billion by 2025
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response identifies the overall rise in the robotics market and correctly recognizes the industrial sector as the largest, while its paragraph structure makes the main progression easy to follow. However, coverage is incomplete and sometimes inaccurate, particularly the omitted total-market figures and the incorrect military value for 2010. Prioritize separating the total-market chart from the sector table and verifying every year-value pairing before writing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview captures the upward trend and industrial dominance, but the total-market chart is scarcely developed and one military figure is seriously inaccurate.
Report key totals from the upper chart, then compare all four sectors using checked values from matching years.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a recognizable introduction-overview-details sequence, though some referents are vague and the two visuals are not clearly separated.
Use one detail paragraph for total market growth and another for sector comparisons, naming each series directly.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for describing trends and sectors, but repetition and awkward combinations such as global sales market reduce precision.
Use concise standard terms such as market size, sector, rose to, and was projected to reach.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex forms are attempted, but recurring tense, preposition, and clause-linking errors make several comparisons awkward or ambiguous.
Choose past tense for historical figures and future or projection language for 2025, using one clear comparison per sentence.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graphs below show the global robotics market during 2000 and 2025 based on sectors.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.