The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.
Sample Response
The line graph and table demonstrate the trends of the global water use in three different sectors from 1900 to 2000 and compares the water usage in Congo and Brazil in 2001. There was an overall upward trend in water use in these three sectors over this period. Water consumption in Brazil was much higher than that of Congo.
Consuming water in agriculture, industrial and domestic fields all increased dramatically during this time. The figures for agriculture show the most significant changes of all. Between 1900 and 1950 its quantity rose to around 1,000 km3 and then there was a sudden rise of 2,000 km3 in 2000. The patterns of industrial and domestic water consumption were very similar to each other. Starting at almost 100 and 50 km3 respectively in 1900 and had remained nearly constant until 1950. After that, the former jumped noticeably to around 110 km3 in 2000. Likewise, the later saw a significant peak, rising by nearly 5 times (from approximately 50 to 250 km3) at the same time.
It is clearly seen from the table that the water consumption in Brazil, which had 176 million people, was significantly higher than that of Congo in spite of lower population in Congo (5.2 million), which had 265 times as less space as Brazil had.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct preposition Original: trends of the global water use Suggested revision: trends in global water use Why it matters: The natural collocation is trends in, and global water use does not require an article.
- 2. Fix verb agreement Original: compares Suggested revision: compare Why it matters: The compound subject the line graph and table requires a plural verb.
- 3. Use concise term Original: usage Suggested revision: use Why it matters: Water use is the more concise standard term for the quantity represented.
- 4. Correct table year Original: 2001 Suggested revision: 2000 Why it matters: The table reports data for 2000, not 2001.
- 5. Fix sentence subject Original: Consuming water in agriculture, industrial and domestic fields Suggested revision: Water consumption in the agricultural, industrial and domestic sectors Why it matters: The replacement supplies a clear noun phrase and parallel sector labels as the subject.
- 6. Keep past tense Original: show Suggested revision: showed Why it matters: Past tense is needed for a completed historical period.
- 7. Clarify reference Original: its quantity Suggested revision: agricultural water use Why it matters: The pronoun does not clearly refer to the amount of water used by agriculture.
- 8. Include starting value Original: rose to around 1,000 km3 Suggested revision: rose from about 500 to around 1,000 km³ Why it matters: The graph begins at roughly 500 km³ in 1900 before approaching 1,000 km³ in 1950.
- 9. Describe gradual change Original: sudden Suggested revision: further Why it matters: The graph shows continued growth across several decades rather than one sudden jump.
- 10. Clarify interval Original: of 2,000 km3 in 2000 Suggested revision: of about 2,000 km³ by 2000 Why it matters: Agricultural use increased by roughly this amount over the period from 1950 to 2000.
- 11. Correct industrial figure Original: around 110 km3 Suggested revision: around 1,200 km³ Why it matters: Industrial water use reaches approximately 1,200 km³ in 2000.
- 12. Use latter Original: later Suggested revision: latter Why it matters: Latter is the word used for the second of two previously mentioned items.
Suggested Rewrites
- trends of the global water use trends in global water use
- compares compare
- usage use
- 2001 2000
- Consuming water in agriculture, industrial and domestic fields Water consumption in the agricultural, industrial and domestic sectors
- show showed
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response has a clear overview and a generally logical movement from the graph to the country comparison. Its effectiveness is substantially reduced by inaccurate figures, notably industrial use at about 110 km³ instead of roughly 1,200, and by very limited treatment of the table's irrigated-land and per-person data. The highest priority is to verify each value against the visual and make complete, exact comparisons between Brazil and Congo.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main upward trends and Brazil's higher consumption are identified, but several figures are inaccurate and most table data is omitted.
Report the correct industrial and domestic endpoints and compare the two countries using population, irrigated land, and per-person consumption figures.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a sensible overview-to-detail structure, though some referencing and sentence connections interrupt the flow.
Keep each comparison in a complete sentence and use former and latter only when their references are unmistakable.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient vocabulary for trends and comparisons, but several collocations and word choices are inaccurate or awkward.
Use precise expressions such as water use in agriculture, reached, and irrigated land rather than vague terms such as quantity or space.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures conveys the main meaning, despite recurring errors in sentence construction and comparison forms.
Eliminate fragments and practise accurate comparative patterns, especially times as much as and higher than.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.