The first pie chart shows how energy is used in an average house in a European country. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions from this energy use in this country.
Sample Response
The first pie chart compares the power consumption in a typical house whereas the second one presents data on the percentage of greenhouse-gas emissionsthe percentages of greenhouse effects of this energy usethese power-consuming equipment in a European country.
As a general trend, the more energy a household appliance usesuse, the more greenhouse gas it emits. As can be seen, water heating and keeping the house warm or cool consume almost half of the energy used by an average householdenergy required in an average family in this country. Cooking, standby power and lighting togetherCooking, standby and lighting all together account for around 21% of energy useutilise around 20% power while refrigeration accounts for 12% of energy userefrigerators alone need 12% electricity. All other appliances consume the remaining 24% of energy usethe rest of the one-quarter energy share in this countrystate. Interestingly, there is a correlation between the percentage of energy a particular device requires to run and the percentage of greenhouse gas this device produces except for heating and coolingwith the exception of heating and cooling device. Heating and cooling devices emit the highest percentage of greenhouse-gas emissionshighest percentages of greenhouse gas though they consume less power than water heatingheaters. Other devices produce greenhouse-gas emissionscontribute to emitting dangerous gases based on the percentages of energy they require to function. Heating water, warming and cooling the rooms account forattribute to more than half of the total greenhouse gas emissions. Cooking, stand by and lighting togethercombinedly contribute to 14% of greenhouse-gas emissions14% gas production which is almost the same as the amount produced by other appliances in a house.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response selects nearly all major figures and makes useful comparisons, especially between energy use and emissions for heating, water heating, and the smaller categories. Its main limitation is recurring imprecise or unnatural wording, which sometimes obscures otherwise accurate observations, while the single long body paragraph also weakens progression. Prioritise precise chart terminology and collocations, then separate energy-use details from emissions comparisons into clearly organised paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and accurately covers nearly all major proportions and comparisons, although the general correlation claim is oversimplified.
Describe the relationship between energy use and emissions more cautiously, highlighting the contrasting heating and cooling figures without implying a universal pattern.
Coherence and Cohesion
The report moves broadly from energy consumption to emissions, but repeated ideas and a single long body paragraph weaken progression.
Use separate detail paragraphs for energy use and greenhouse-gas emissions, with each paragraph built around clear comparisons.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the task, but recurring imprecise collocations such as greenhouse effects, dangerous gases, and attribute to reduce accuracy.
Use standard chart language such as greenhouse-gas emissions, accounts for, and contributes to, and avoid vague device labels.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex sentences, though agreement, article, and singular-plural errors recur without usually obscuring meaning.
Check subject-verb agreement and noun forms carefully, especially after plural subjects such as appliances, equipment, and devices.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The first pie chart shows how energy is used in an average house in a European country. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions from this energy use in this country.
Your response
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