The graph below shows the population figures of different types of turtles in India between 1980 and 2012.
Sample Response
The total number of all species of turtles in India has been relatively stable over the last two decades, although there were significant drops in numbers between 1987 and 1989 and again in 1992 and 1996. Since 2004 there has been an improvement in numbers of all species, although the graph shows a slight decrease in 2010.
In contrast, the population of Leatherback turtles has suffered a severe decline, particularly in 1988 when numbers fell dramatically. The rate of decline in the population appears to have slowed and it has remained relatively stable since 2009.
There was also a fall in the number of Green turtles of around 30% between 1984 and 2002. The population increased slightly in 2010 but it had dropped again by 2012.
It is only Olive Ridley turtles that have seen a steady increase in population over this period. Their numbers dropped slightly in 2007 and again in 2012 but the overall trend has been a positive one.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use index terminology Original: total number of all species Suggested revision: overall population index for all species Why it matters: The graph reports an index with 1980 set to 100, rather than absolute turtle totals.
- 2. Correct time span Original: last two decades Suggested revision: period shown Why it matters: The graph covers 1980 to 2012, which is more than three decades.
- 3. Use accurate scale Original: around 30% Suggested revision: about 20 index points Why it matters: The Green Turtle series falls from roughly 105 to 85, and the vertical scale shows index points rather than percentages.
- 4. Qualify the trend Original: steady increase Suggested revision: overall upward trend Why it matters: The Olive Ridley index rises overall but includes several noticeable falls.
- 5. Reflect fall size Original: dropped slightly in 2007 Suggested revision: fell sharply in 2007 Why it matters: The Olive Ridley series drops by close to ten index points around 2007.
- 6. Use past tense Original: has been relatively stable Suggested revision: was relatively stable Why it matters: Simple past is more appropriate for the completed period from 1980 to 2012.
- 7. Avoid overstatement Original: significant drops Suggested revision: noticeable dips Why it matters: The all-species line fluctuates within a fairly narrow range rather than showing large falls.
- 8. Correct dip timing Original: again in 1992 and 1996 Suggested revision: again around 1991-1992 Why it matters: The all-species line dips around 1992 but does not show a comparable fall in 1996.
- 9. Clarify reference and period Original: it has remained relatively stable since 2009 Suggested revision: the index remained relatively stable from 2009 to 2012 Why it matters: The revision identifies the measure clearly and uses a completed time range.
- 10. Use index terminology Original: fall in the number of Green turtles Suggested revision: decline in the Green Turtle index Why it matters: The graph plots an indexed series rather than an absolute turtle count.
- 11. Mark contrasting clause Original: slightly in 2010 but Suggested revision: slightly in 2010, but Why it matters: A comma should precede the coordinating conjunction joining the two independent clauses.
- 12. Use simple past Original: had dropped again Suggested revision: dropped again Why it matters: Simple past is sufficient because the sequence is already clear from the dated points.
Suggested Rewrites
- total number of all species overall population index for all species
- last two decades period shown
- around 30% about 20 index points
- steady increase overall upward trend
- dropped slightly in 2007 fell sharply in 2007
- has been relatively stable was relatively stable
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response is strongest in its clear, well-controlled organisation: each turtle group is handled separately and the overall directions are easy to follow. Its main limitation is factual precision, with several dates and magnitudes misstated, including the timing of the Leatherback fall and the size of the Green turtle decline. The priority is to verify turning points and quantify changes directly from the graph before drafting.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies the main direction for all four series, but several dates and magnitudes do not accurately reflect the graph.
Check exact turning points and replace unsupported claims, such as the 30% Green turtle fall, with accurate comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the aggregate line to the three individual species, with clear paragraphing and natural linking.
Strengthen cross-series comparison by grouping related rising and falling trends rather than treating every species almost entirely separately.
Lexical Resource
A varied and precise range, including language for decline, stability, and recovery, conveys trends effectively with little awkwardness.
Use more exact quantitative phrasing so lexical precision supports, rather than overstates, the visual evidence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A broad range of complex structures is handled accurately, and errors are rare and do not impede meaning.
Refine occasional awkward structures, particularly the cleft construction used to introduce Olive Ridley turtles.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the population figures of different types of turtles in India between 1980 and 2012.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.