The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.
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Sample Response
The line graph illustrates the month-by-month fluctuations in the prices of three metal commodities—coppercommodities- copper, nickel, and zinc- spanning the entirety of the year 2014. The juxtaposition of these trends not only elucidates the intricate dynamics of the commodities market but also underscores the inherent volatility that characterizes it.
To commence, an overarching observation reveals that despite the more pronounced fluctuations in the price trajectories of nickel and zinc, copper's monthly price changes remained mostly positive throughout the yearcopper consistently exhibits a rising trend for a significant portion of the year, displaying a remarkable degree of stability amidst volatility.
In terms of the magnitude of price changes, copper, often lauded for its stability, demonstrates relatively modest variations, ranging between -0.5% and 2%oscillating between 2% and -0.5%. In contrast, zinc and nickel exhibit considerably wider price swings, with fluctuations ranging from 3% to -1% and 6% to -3%, respectively.
From January to May, both copper and nickel experience sustained declines, with copper gradually decreasing from 2% to -0.5% and nickel dropping from 6% in January to around -0.5% in Maynickel plummeting from 6% to just below 1%. Meanwhile, zinc rose to 3% in Februaryinitially experiences a surge to 3% in January, followed by a gradual return to its initial value. Subsequently, nickel and zinc follow a similar trajectory, with a sharp drop in Juneincluding a significant dip in June, a minor drop in October, a plateau spanning from July to September, and a notable increase in November. Copper maintained positive price changes for ten months of the yearCopper maintains positive price changes for 10 months of the year, dipping slightly below zero only in May and June, at -0.5%. By the year’s end, the price variations of the three metals converge remarkably, considering their disparate starting points, resting at 1%, 1.5%, and 2% for nickel, copper, and zinc, respectively.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay presents a sophisticated, detailed analysis of the graph with clear organisation and advanced vocabulary. Its main limitation is a minor misreading of the specific month in which zinc peaked before declining. To improve, ensure all key data points and peak months are cross-checked carefully against the visual evidence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and detailed comparison of data across the year, though it misattributed zinc's 3% peak to January instead of February.
Verify time markers against data points to ensure all specific monthly trends are accurately assigned.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information and key trends are logically organised into clear thematic paragraphs with seamless transitions.
Maintain this logical grouping while ensuring the visual trend progression remains easy to follow chronologically.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise range of academic vocabulary is used naturally and appropriately throughout.
Continue employing flexible vocabulary while maintaining exact precision when describing numerical variations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writing demonstrates a wide variety of complex grammatical structures with a consistently high level of accuracy.
Sustain this strong grammatical control while continuing to incorporate complex sentence patterns effortlessly.