The line graph below shows the number of visitors to museums or special exhibitions at museums in one European country in 1999, 2009 and 2019.
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Sample Response
The given graph illustratesillustrares the number of traveller to museums or special exhibitions at museums in aan European country in 1999, 2009 and 2019.
Overall,it is clear that the number of traveller visiting the art and science museumsgo to art museum and science museum followed ana upward trend betweenin between 1999 and 2019. Whereas,the figures for history museum and cultural museum experienced a decreasedecreased in this period. The number of visitors chose national history museum remained unchanged.
The quantity of people to art museum rose from exactly 100nearly 85 in 1999 to 120 in 2009,and then it climbed to almost 150climbed almost 160 in 2019.Similarly, the figure for science museum increased from nearly 65increased nearly 70 to over 120 in those two decades.
Looking at the numberamount of visitors to history museum saw a steady dropa steadily dropped from 80 to nearly 60 betweenbwteen 1999 and 2019,whilewhlie the figure for cultural museum declineddelined from 55 in 1999 to nearly 40 in 2019. With regard to the national history museum ,which saw a slight increasea slightly increased throughout the period, by 2019 it came close toreached closely to the number of history museum at almost 50.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The essay successfully identifies the overall trends and covers key data points from the visual graph. However, performance is lowered by frequent grammatical inaccuracies, inappropriate vocabulary choices, and noticeable punctuation errors throughout the text. To raise the score, focus on correcting sentence structure, eliminating mechanical grammar errors, and ensuring precise data interpretation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main trends and key figures are broadly identified, though there is a minor contradiction regarding whether the National History Museum stayed unchanged or increased slightly.
Ensure all statements in the overview accurately match the detailed descriptions provided in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is organized into paragraphs, but missing spaces after commas and incomplete sentence structures disrupt the smooth flow of the text.
Practice proper spacing after punctuation marks and ensure subordinate clauses are correctly attached to main clauses.
Lexical Resource
Word choice shows some range related to trends, but noticeable spelling errors and inaccurate word forms recur throughout the response.
Review basic word forms such as noun-verb agreements and check spelling of common task terms like 'illustrates' and 'declined'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures is attempted, but grammatical errors such as incorrect verb forms and fragment sentences occur frequently.
Focus on constructing accurate simple and complex sentences using correct verb tenses and form combinations like noun phrases.