The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its lifecycle.
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Sample Response
The diagram illustrates environmental issues created by a consumer product during its lifecycle. It can be clearly seen that there are seven steps in the product manufacturing process, beginning with planning and design and culminating in recycling and these steps have negative consequences to the environment. To begin with, the product manufacturing begins with the planning and design. Once it is complete, the next step, consumption of materials and energy resources, takes place which is followed by manufacturing of the product. These two steps consume natural resource and emit waste and CO2 which is detrimental to the environment. Afterwards, the products are packed, distributed and offered in retail outlets. The products are unquestionably used by customers who either dispose the product or recycle it. Disposal of products seriously harms the environment. However, recycling of the product reduces negative impacts on the ecosystem. Moreover, customers provide feedback in order to improve the product planning.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Name lifecycle accurately Original: manufacturing Suggested revision: lifecycle Why it matters: Planning and design begin the full product lifecycle, not only manufacturing.
- 2. Remove unnecessary article Original: the planning and design Suggested revision: planning and design Why it matters: The stage name does not take the definite article in this structure.
- 3. Clarify reference Original: Once it is complete Suggested revision: Once this stage is complete Why it matters: This stage gives the pronoun a clear reference to planning and design.
- 4. Link stages correctly Original: which Suggested revision: and Why it matters: The coordinated passive form connects the two consecutive stages without a faulty relative clause.
- 5. Use plural noun Original: resource Suggested revision: resources Why it matters: The statement refers generally to multiple material and energy resources.
- 6. Fix agreement and comma Original: CO2 which is detrimental Suggested revision: CO2, which are detrimental Why it matters: The relative clause refers to both waste and CO2, so it needs a comma and a plural verb.
- 7. Use sequence language Original: unquestionably Suggested revision: then Why it matters: Then marks the next stage clearly, while unquestionably adds unsupported emphasis.
- 8. Add required preposition Original: dispose the product Suggested revision: dispose of the product Why it matters: Dispose requires of before its object.
- 9. Use precise impact phrase Original: environmental issues created by Suggested revision: environmental impacts associated with Why it matters: Associated with avoids implying that the product itself directly creates every issue.
- 10. Use diagram terminology Original: manufacturing Suggested revision: production Why it matters: Production matches the name of the third stage in the diagram.
- 11. Use correct waste verb Original: emit waste and Suggested revision: produce waste and emit Why it matters: Waste is produced, whereas a gas such as CO2 is emitted.
- 12. Keep noun number consistent Original: products Suggested revision: product Why it matters: The response begins with a representative singular product, so keeping the singular improves consistency.
Suggested Rewrites
- manufacturing lifecycle
- the planning and design planning and design
- Once it is complete Once this stage is complete
- which and
- resource resources
- CO2 which is detrimental CO2, which are detrimental
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response follows the lifecycle logically and covers all seven labelled stages, including disposal, recycling and the feedback loop, with generally varied and appropriate language. Its main limitation is that it adds unsupported claims about waste, carbon dioxide and environmental harm, and its one-paragraph structure compresses the description. Focus first on distinguishing what the diagram explicitly shows from reasonable but unprovided interpretation, while grouping the main cycle and its branches more clearly.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All seven stages and the main disposal, recycling and feedback branches are identified, but the overview oversimplifies the cycle and several environmental effects are not shown in the diagram.
Describe the diagram’s explicit flows accurately, including recycling returning to material and energy consumption, without adding unsupported claims about emissions or ecological impact.
Coherence and Cohesion
The lifecycle is presented in a clear sequence with effective progression, although the single paragraph compresses the overview, main cycle and branching outcomes.
Use a separate overview and divide the details between the main production-to-use sequence and the disposal, recycling and feedback branches.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of process vocabulary, though a few choices such as “unquestionably” and “consequences to” are awkward or unnecessary.
Prefer precise neutral phrasing such as “adverse effects on the environment” and reserve evaluative language for information explicitly shown.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are used with generally good control, while a few errors in noun number, coordination and verb patterns remain.
Correct forms such as “natural resources,” “dispose of the product” and the coordination of long overview clauses.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its lifecycle.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.