The diagrams below show the layout of the town's shopping centre at present and after a future redevelopment.

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Sample Response

1

The diagrams illustrate planned alterations to a two-level shopping centre, showing both the current and proposed layouts.

2

Overall, the renovation will bringbrings substantial change to both floors. The most noticeable features are the replacement of stairs with escalators, the addition of a supermarket and a cinema, a reduction in retail units, and the installation of an ATM on Level 2.

3

On Level 1, the department store in the northwest corner remains intact. The entire row of shops along the southern wall is cleared to accommodate a large supermarket. The central staircase is removed and replaced by an escalator. The ATM and lift located between the department store and the north-east shops are retained, and the shops themselves remain untouched. The lift in the southeast corner also remains unchanged.stays in position.

4

On Level 2, most of the original retail strips are removed, though a cluster of shops is retained in the northeast.both the northern and southern rows of shops are demolished. A department store is placed in the northwest corner, and a cinema occupies the full length of the southern side. An ATM, which does not exist on Level 2 in the current plan, is installed next to this department store alongside a new lift.is installed next to this department store. Similar to the ground level,As on the lower floor, the central stairs make way for an escalator.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response presents an exceptionally accurate and well-organised description of the shopping centre redevelopments, featuring a clear overview and accurate spatial details for both floors. Vocabulary and sentence structures are sophisticated, natural, and flexible throughout. To refine the description even further, minor details such as the addition of a lift on Level 2 could be explicitly mentioned.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.0
Scoring rule

Key features and comparative changes across both levels are highlighted accurately with a clear and prominent overview.

Next step

Ensure every secondary visual element added in the future plan, such as the new lift on Level 2, is fully explicitly noted.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.0
Scoring rule

The essay is logically grouped by floor with smooth sentence transitions and precise paragraphing throughout.

Next step

Maintain this effective paragraph structure while varying linkers between sentences to keep the flow completely seamless.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

A wide and precise range of spatial and descriptive vocabulary is used naturally and effectively.

Next step

Continue using topic-specific vocabulary with subtle variations to describe architectural transformations.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

Grammatical structures are varied and complex, exhibiting full control with almost no errors.

Next step

Sustain this high level of grammatical accuracy and structural variety in longer complex sentences.