The graph shows Internet Usage in Taiwan by Age Group, 1998-2000.
Sample Response
The bar chart illustrates the percentages of internet users in Taiwan in fourthree different age groups between 1998 and 2000. Overall, the proportion of users aged 16–30 was considerably higher than the proportions in the older groupsyoung internet users in Taiwan was remarkably higher than older internet users. It is clear that the largest group of internet usershighest internet user was the 16–30 age groupyoung age group (between 16 and 30 years), though the rate decreased over the periodhad decreased over the period, while the under-15 group had the lowest or joint-lowest sharethe lowest was the junior population (aged below 15). In 1998, the largest share of internet usershighest population of internet users in Taiwan was held by 16–30-year-oldswas the young people, as they accounted fortheir figure was accounted for 53% of the total internet users. It fell to 44%dropped drastically to 44% in 2000. As for the middle-aged peoplemiddle age people (between 31 and 50 years), their figure decreased slightlyhad decreased slightly from 41% in 1998 to 37% in 2000. People aged 50 and aboveThe senior people (aged 50 years and above) and the figure for people under 15the junior people figures’ were 4% and 2% in 19982% 1998. As the senior people’s percentage doubledgrew by two-fold, the junior group rate also increased by six percentage points in 1999increased by 6% in 1999. Afterward,And then both figures continued to increase as they reached 10% and 9% in 2000.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response's strongest feature is its accurate selection of the main trends and endpoints, including the decline among the two largest user groups and growth among the youngest and oldest groups. Its main limitation is language control, alongside the incorrect statement that the chart contains three rather than four age groups. The priority is to retain the sound comparisons while correcting group labels, agreement, and percentage phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview and most figures accurately represent all major trends, though the introduction miscounts the age groups and omits some 1999 values for the larger groups.
Identify all four age categories correctly and add a concise comparison of the middle-year values where it clarifies the trends.
Coherence and Cohesion
The report progresses logically from overview to declining groups and then rising groups, but the single-paragraph presentation and repetitive references limit fluency.
Separate the overview from grouped detail paragraphs and use clear category names to avoid repeated phrases such as "their figure."
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for reporting proportions and changes, but imprecise expressions such as "highest internet user" and "junior population" recur.
Use precise terms such as "largest share of users," "under-15 group," and "percentage-point increase."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms communicates the data clearly, but agreement, article, possessive, and passive-form errors occur regularly.
Correct structures such as "users were," "accounted for," and "the figures for the senior and junior groups were."
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph shows Internet Usage in Taiwan by Age Group, 1998-2000.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.