The chart below shows how much money is spent in the budget on different sectors by the UAE government in 2000. Where the money goes
Sample Response
The pie chart shows the governmentnational expenditure of the United Arab Emirates government in 2000. OverallGenerally speaking, the UAE government had a budget of over 300 billion AED and the largest allocation went to social security, followed by health and personal social servicesthe highest portion of this budget was spent on social security and health & social services. As shown in the chartAs is given in the diagram, the UAE government spent AED 290 billion across nine sectorsmore than 300 billion AED in ten different sectors in 2000. Social securitySocial security for the citizens received the largest allocationcost the highest budget and it was exactly 100 billion AED. Health and personal social services, in comparisonon the other hand, received AED 53 billionrequired more than 50 billion and this was the second largest budget allocationbudget money allocation for the UAE government in 2000. The UAE government allocatedThe UAE authority used 38 billion for education, 17 billion for law and order and 13 billion for industry, agriculture and employmentjob, industry and agriculture. The defence sector receivedDefence sector cost them 22 billion which was slightly lower than the debt interest paymentsdebt interests the government paid in this year. Housing, heritage and environment got 15 billion which was close to the AED 17 billion allocated to law and orderwhich was nearly the same as it was allocated for law and order. Finally, 9 billion was spent on the transportation sector and AED 23 billion23 million for other sectors which are not specifically mentioned in the chart.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response identifies the largest allocations and reports nearly all sector figures in a clear, easy-to-follow sequence, with generally controlled sentence structures. Its main limitation is data accuracy: the chart totals AED 290 billion, not over 300 billion, and other expenditure is AED 23 billion rather than 23 million. Prioritise checking units and totals against the chart before writing, then separate the overview from the details.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and broad coverage of all sectors are weakened by an incorrect total and the million/billion error for other expenditure.
Recalculate the AED 290 billion total and reproduce every unit exactly as shown in the chart.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information follows a sensible progression from the largest allocations to the smaller ones, but it is presented as one continuous paragraph.
Use separate paragraphs for the introduction and overview and for grouped detail comparisons.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a sufficient range of budget vocabulary, although several collocations such as cost the highest budget are awkward.
Use more natural combinations such as received the largest allocation and accounted for AED 100 billion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of simple and complex structures is mostly well controlled, with only occasional awkward or faulty constructions.
Refine comparison structures, especially phrases such as nearly the same as the amount allocated to law and order.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows how much money is spent in the budget on different sectors by the UAE government in 2000. Where the money goes
Your response
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