The bar chart illustrates the number of people in the UK eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day.
Sample Response
The given chart gives information about the proportionsproportion of women, men and children in the UK who consumed more than five portions of vegetables and fish daily over the seven years from 2011 to 2017in seven consecutive years from 2011. The bar chart shows the percentage of women, men and children in the UK who ate more than five servings of vegetables and fish per day from 2011 to 2017. It reveals that women had the highest proportion exceeding five servingsthe highest consumption of these foods in every year, while children had the lowest. It also indicates that all three groups showed higher percentages by 2017increased their intake over time, with some fluctuations. Exactly 20% of the women ate more than five portions of vegetables and fish in the first three years. This proportion thenThis number thereafter soared to about 36% in 2016around 37% in 2016, before experiencing a drop to 30% in 2017. The proportion of men started at roughly 17% and climbed gradually to just above 25%, despite a drop to approximately 23% in 2016. Beginning at a much lower levelposition compared to the other groups, the figure forof children grew from 10% to about 14% in the first year, after which it fluctuated slightly and reached 15% in 2017.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response gives an accurate overview, selects representative figures for all three groups, and uses varied language with strong grammatical control. Its main weakness is organisation: the two opening sentences repeat the same information and the entire report forms one paragraph, while some intermediate changes receive limited attention; the priority is to remove the duplicate introduction and divide the overview and grouped details into clear paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview accurately identifies the group ranking and broad movement, and the supporting figures capture the principal patterns with only limited omissions.
Add one or two carefully selected intermediate comparisons, especially for the sharp rise in the women's figure after 2013.
Coherence and Cohesion
The ideas follow a clear overview-to-detail sequence, but the duplicated introduction and lack of paragraph breaks weaken the report's organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for the introduction, overview, and grouped details, and delete the repeated paraphrase of the task.
Lexical Resource
A broad and generally precise range of vocabulary describes proportions and fluctuations naturally, with only occasional awkward phrasing.
Prefer proportion of children or figure for children to less natural expressions such as the figure of children.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex sentences are mostly accurate and well controlled, with minor awkwardness that does not affect clarity.
Tighten introductory time expressions so the full period is stated once in a complete and economical structure.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The bar chart illustrates the number of people in the UK eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.