The table below gives information about UK independent films.
Sample Response
The table provides information about different types of independent films released in the UK and the Republic of Ireland in 2012. It indicates how many films of different genres were made and also shows what proportion of total ticket sales was made by each kind of film.
The table makes it very clear that there is no correlation between the number of films made in any category and the proportion of ticket sales earned by that sort of film. For example, the largest numbers of films were made in the Drama and Documentary categories – 35 of each of these were released. However, they earned only 8.3 and 2.9 percent of total ticket sales respectively.
Comedy films were the most financially successful: 26 films, out of a total of 148, earned 45.4 percent of all the income from ticket sales. Another very successful type of film in 2012 was the biopic. Although only one of these was released, it accounted for 9.1 percent of ticket sales.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the correct metric Original: what proportion of total ticket sales was made by each kind of film Suggested revision: what proportion of total ticket income was generated by each genre Why it matters: The table reports income from ticket sales, and a proportion is generated rather than made.
- 2. Avoid an absolute claim Original: no correlation Suggested revision: no clear relationship Why it matters: The figures show an inconsistent relationship but do not establish a statistical absence of correlation.
- 3. Name income precisely Original: proportion of ticket sales earned Suggested revision: proportion of ticket-sale income generated Why it matters: The final column measures income share rather than the number of tickets sold.
- 4. Use the chart term Original: sort of film Suggested revision: genre Why it matters: Genre is the precise category label used in the table.
- 5. Correct the measure Original: of total ticket sales respectively Suggested revision: of total ticket-sale income, respectively Why it matters: These percentages refer to income, and the comma clearly separates the final adverb.
- 6. Avoid implying profit Original: very successful type of film Suggested revision: genre with a high share of ticket income Why it matters: The table gives revenue share and does not provide costs or profit figures.
- 7. Specify income share Original: 9.1 percent of ticket sales Suggested revision: 9.1 percent of ticket-sale income Why it matters: The percentage represents income from ticket sales rather than ticket volume.
- 8. Sentence rewrite Original: Comedy films were the most financially successful: 26 films, out of a total of 148, earned 45.4 percent of all the income from ticket sales. Suggested revision: Comedy generated the largest share of ticket income: its 26 releases accounted for 45.4% of the total. Why it matters: This states the observed revenue measure accurately without implying profitability.
- 9. Sharpen the overview Suggested revision: State the dominant pattern explicitly: comedy generated by far the largest income share, while release volume did not consistently predict income. Why it matters: A clearer overview should identify the most prominent feature rather than rely mainly on a general correlation claim.
- 10. Include the horror category Suggested revision: Add that horror generated the second-largest income share, 20.2%, from 14 releases, and compare it with comedy. Why it matters: Horror is a major feature of the table and is currently omitted.
Suggested Rewrites
- what proportion of total ticket sales was made by each kind of film what proportion of total ticket income was generated by each genre
- no correlation no clear relationship
- proportion of ticket sales earned proportion of ticket-sale income generated
- sort of film genre
- of total ticket sales respectively of total ticket-sale income, respectively
- very successful type of film genre with a high share of ticket income
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is concise, fluent, and especially strong in selecting accurate figures that reveal the mismatch between release numbers and ticket income. Its main limitation is that the coverage is slightly narrow, notably omitting horror films despite their substantial income share. The highest-priority improvement is to include that second-leading category and make one more direct comparison across the table.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and well-chosen, accurate figures identify the dominant patterns, although the sizeable 20.2% income share for horror is omitted.
Add the most important remaining category and compare its income share directly with its proportion of releases.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses clearly from an introduction and overview to focused examples, with cohesive links used naturally.
Strengthen the final paragraph by explicitly linking the biopic example back to the overall mismatch identified earlier.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is precise and flexible, with effective terms for genres, proportions, releases, and financial performance.
Use the slightly more exact phrase 'share of ticket income' consistently when referring to the final column.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A varied range of complex structures is handled accurately, and punctuation supports effortless reading throughout.
For further refinement, vary the repeated passive construction 'were made' when introducing comparisons.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information about UK independent films.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.