The graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on the cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.
Sample Response
The given line graph shows the average annual expendituredepicts the data of average yearly spending of US consumers on the cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010over a decade from 2001.
A cursory glance at the graph is enough to show that consumer spendingthe customer spending on residential phone decreased whereas spending on cell phone services increasedand on the mobile phone had increased. In 2001In the beginning year, that was in 2001, consumers spentthe phone users spend aboutmassive $690 for residential phone services. Whereas, on mobile phone services they spent almost six-fold less than the land phone, that was 200$. In 2002Again, the very next year in 2002, spending on cell phone servicesthe mobile customer spending pattern roseslightly went up to $300. DeleteSurprisingly, expenditure on residential phone servicesthe residential phone users’ expenditure dropped to $650 in the same year. In the following years, spending on cell phone services rose sharplythe cell phone users spending skyrocketed and spending on residential phone services fellresidential phone users spending dropped down , with the two figures crossing between 2006 and 2007and reached the same rate of $550 in 2006. Then, spending on residential phone servicesthe land phone users spending pattern sank to $400 in 2010. However, the cell phone users spending hiked to almost two-fold than residential phone users, that was around $800 in the same period.
Overall, the residential phone user declined tremendously and cell phone users increased in the USA during the period of from 2001 to 2010.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response identifies the opposing trends clearly and supports them with relevant starting, crossover, and ending figures. Its main limitation is imprecise phrasing and a few inaccurate or overstated details, especially the 2010 cell-phone figure and the final comparison, while sentence-control errors recur. Prioritize reporting figures more precisely and using simpler, grammatically complete comparison sentences throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main opposing trends, approximate endpoints, and crossover are all identified with generally relevant figures.
Report the final cell-phone value more precisely and qualify approximations consistently when comparing the two services.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear chronological path, although some linking is mechanical and the main detail paragraph is densely packed.
Group the early and later periods into separate paragraphs and connect comparisons within complete sentences.
Lexical Resource
There is adequate vocabulary for trends and comparisons, but several choices such as 'massive,' 'hiked,' and 'spending pattern' are imprecise or unnatural.
Use neutral, accurate trend language and vary references to expenditure without forcing uncommon expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms is attempted, but agreement, article, possessive, and clause-structure errors recur throughout.
Check subject-verb agreement and replace fragmentary 'Whereas' clauses and repeated 'that was' structures with complete comparisons.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on the cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.