The charts below show the percentage of water used by different sectors in Sydney, Australia, in 1997 and 2007.
Sample Response
The two pie charts compare the percentage of total water consumedused by five sectors in Sydney, Australia, in 1997 and 2007. Overall, the food industry remained the largest consumer in both years, although its share fell. By contrast, the building industry registered the lowest water consumptionused the least water and declined further. The most noticeable change was the sharp rise in water use by the service industrysharp rise in the service industry, while manufacturing decreased and household use stayed relatively stable. In 1997, the food industry accounted for 48% of the total water use, representing nearly half48% of total water use, nearly half of the total and far more than any other sector. Household use was the second-largest categorysecond largest category, at 19%, followed by manufacturing at 15% and the service industry at 13%. The building industry made up only 5%. By 2007, the food industry’s proportion had dropped by 7 percentage points to 41%, but it was still the dominant consumer.still the biggest user. Water consumption in the service industry nearly doubledThe service industry almost doubled, rising from 13% to 25%, and overtook both household use and manufacturing. Household consumption increased only slightly, from 19% to 21%. Manufacturing fell from 15% to 11%; consequently, the gap between, so the gap between the service industry and manufacturing widened from 2 percentage points to 14 percentage points.to 14. The building industry continued to decline, falling to a minimal 2%.reaching just 2%.
Why this response received Band 9.0
The essay is exceptionally well-written, accurately summarizing all key data points and trends from both pie charts with precision. It features a clear structure, logical progression, sophisticated lexical choices, and error-free grammatical range throughout. To maintain this high level of performance, continue incorporating nuanced analytical comparisons between figures, such as explicit calculations of gap changes, across different data presentation tasks.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All key features and data from both pie charts are fully presented, accurately described, and supported by precise numerical evidence.
Maintain this high standard by continuing to select the most salient comparisons without adding redundant information.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organized into distinct paragraphs with smooth transitions and clear cohesive devices.
Continue using natural referencing and cohesive strategies to connect statistical trends seamlessly.
Lexical Resource
A wide range of vocabulary is used with full flexibility, natural collocations, and precise statistical terminology.
Sustain this varied vocabulary usage while adapting appropriately to different chart types and contexts.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A comprehensive variety of complex grammatical structures is employed accurately and fluently without errors.
Keep utilizing advanced syntactic patterns naturally to highlight comparisons and trends.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show the percentage of water used by different sectors in Sydney, Australia, in 1997 and 2007.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.