Your car insurance company has told you that they are going to increase the amount you have to pay in insurance for your car each month. You are not happy about this. Write a letter to your insurance company. In your letter: - explain Why you are writing to them - Why you think the insurance should not be increased - What you want them to do
Sample Response
Dear Sir / Madam, I am writing to you as I recently received a letter from you informing me that the insurance premium for my car is going to increase from next month. As you will be aware if you check my records, I have held my insurance with your company for nearly seven years now. During this time, I have never had an accident and never had any reason to make a claim on my insurance. I understand that at times prices need to be increased. However, this increase you are suggesting will result in a 20% increase in the amount I pay each month, a rate I feel is too much. I would therefore like you to write back to me and explain why such an increase has been proposed. If you are unable to justify it to my satisfaction, then I am afraid that I will have no other option but to move my insurance to another company. I look forward to hearing from you, Yours faithfully, Mr Mahmoud Khan
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use standard salutation Original: Dear Sir / Madam Suggested revision: Dear Sir or Madam Why it matters: This is the conventional formal salutation when the recipient's name is unknown.
- 2. Make wording concise Original: never had any reason to make Suggested revision: never needed to make Why it matters: The shorter phrase expresses the same claim more directly.
- 3. Use concise wording Original: at times prices need to be increased Suggested revision: price increases are sometimes necessary Why it matters: This phrasing states the concession more naturally and precisely.
- 4. Avoid wordy phrasing Original: this increase you are suggesting Suggested revision: the proposed increase Why it matters: The concise noun phrase is more appropriate for a formal complaint.
- 5. Avoid repeated increase Original: will result in a 20% increase Suggested revision: will raise my monthly premium by 20% Why it matters: This revision removes repetition and states exactly what will change.
- 6. Choose precise wording Original: a rate I feel is too much Suggested revision: an amount I consider excessive Why it matters: The complaint concerns the increased amount, and “excessive” suits the formal register.
- 7. Use formal verb Original: write back to me Suggested revision: respond Why it matters: “Respond” is more concise and suitably formal for correspondence with an insurer.
- 8. Use natural collocation Original: move my insurance to another company Suggested revision: switch to another insurer Why it matters: This is the natural expression for changing insurance providers.
- 9. Separate the closing Original: you, Yours faithfully, Suggested revision: you. Yours faithfully, Why it matters: The final sentence needs a full stop before the separate complimentary close.
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: As you will be aware if you check my records, I have held my insurance with your company for nearly seven years now. Suggested revision: As your records will show, I have had my car insured with your company for nearly seven years. Why it matters: The revision removes the awkward conditional wording and uses a natural insurance collocation.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Sir / Madam Dear Sir or Madam
- never had any reason to make never needed to make
- at times prices need to be increased price increases are sometimes necessary
- this increase you are suggesting the proposed increase
- will result in a 20% increase will raise my monthly premium by 20%
- a rate I feel is too much an amount I consider excessive
Why this response received Band 8.0
The letter is concise, formally appropriate, and persuasive, using a strong record of claim-free insurance to challenge the proposed increase. Its main limitation is that the requested outcome focuses on receiving an explanation rather than directly asking the company to reconsider or withdraw the increase. The highest-priority improvement is to state that desired action explicitly and organise the grounds and request in separate paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose, objection, supporting reasons, and requested response are all clear, with an appropriately firm formal tone.
Ask directly for the increase to be reviewed or withdrawn, in addition to requesting an explanation.
Coherence and Cohesion
The reasoning progresses smoothly from notification of the increase through the customer's record and objection to the requested response.
Use separate paragraphs for the reason for writing, the justification, and the action requested.
Lexical Resource
Precise insurance vocabulary and controlled formal expressions communicate the complaint clearly and professionally.
Replace the slightly awkward phrase ‘a rate I feel is too much’ with ‘an increase I consider excessive.’
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are varied, accurate, and well controlled throughout, with punctuation supporting clear meaning.
Maintain this control while shortening the longest conditional sentence for even greater directness.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
Your car insurance company has told you that they are going to increase the amount you have to pay in insurance for your car each month. You are not happy about this. Write a letter to your insurance company. In your letter:
- explain Why you are writing to them
- Why you think the insurance should not be increased
- What you want them to do
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.