You play sports (e.g. football) for a local team. You recently heard that a player in your team is in a hospital. Write a letter to your teammate. In your letter: - say how you feel about the news - ask about the treatment in the hospital - suggest some ways of cheering him/her up
Sample Response
Dear Brian, I hope that you are feeling well and trying to make the best out of the worst situation. I have just heard the news about your accident from our team manager over the phone, and I must say that I was quite shocked to hear the sad news. I would certainly like to ask you about how the accident took place, or what exactly you were doing at the time of the accident, but I guess that I better save the questions for now. Anyway, from what I heard from our team manager, I am assuming that your left leg has signs of some fractures, but you can’t be sure unless an X-ray of your leg is taken. So, what kind of treatment are you receiving at the hospital now? Are you feeling comfortable there? By the way, you will be glad to know that our whole team has finally got permission to practise swimming in that big swimming pool in the city centre, where you have always wanted to go. I am sure that we will go there sometime once you are recovered. That is all for now. Best wishes, Joseph
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the standard expression Original: make the best out of Suggested revision: make the best of Why it matters: Make the best of is the established expression.
- 2. Avoid repeating news Original: hear the sad news Suggested revision: hear it Why it matters: News has already appeared earlier in the sentence, so the pronoun avoids repetition.
- 3. Remove the extra preposition Original: ask you about how Suggested revision: ask you how Why it matters: Ask takes a direct embedded question without about.
- 4. Use had better correctly Original: I guess that I better Suggested revision: I guess I had better Why it matters: The fixed structure is had better plus the base verb.
- 5. Avoid repeated from Original: from what I heard from our team manager Suggested revision: based on what our team manager told me Why it matters: The replacement removes repetition and reads more naturally.
- 6. Use the singular condition Original: signs of some fractures Suggested revision: signs of a fracture Why it matters: The sentence refers generally to a possible fracture in one leg.
- 7. Use a clearer verb Original: got Suggested revision: received Why it matters: Received is clearer than got in this context.
- 8. Use the active perfect form Original: are Suggested revision: have Why it matters: Have recovered is the natural form for completing recovery.
- 9. Offer direct cheering support Suggested revision: Add a concrete offer to cheer Brian up, such as visiting him or sharing messages from the team, alongside the swimming-pool news. Why it matters: The letter shares positive news but gives no direct practical suggestion for cheering him up now.
- 10. Group the three purposes Suggested revision: Separate the sympathy, treatment questions, and cheering-up message into distinct paragraphs. Why it matters: Clear grouping would make the progression through the requested points easier to follow.
Suggested Rewrites
- make the best out of make the best of
- hear the sad news hear it
- ask you about how ask you how
- I guess that I better I guess I had better
- from what I heard from our team manager based on what our team manager told me
- signs of some fractures signs of a fracture
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter maintains a warm, supportive tone, directly asks about the hospital treatment, and gives the injured teammate an encouraging future activity to anticipate. Its main limitation is that the cheering-up suggestion is less fully developed than the concern and treatment sections, while several phrases sound slightly unnatural. The priority is to add one immediate supportive action, such as a team visit, and refine the few awkward expressions.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The feelings and treatment questions are clearly developed, and the future swimming plan offers encouragement, though immediate cheering-up support is comparatively limited.
Add a specific current action, such as arranging a team visit, bringing entertainment, or calling regularly during the hospital stay.
Coherence and Cohesion
The message follows a coherent sequence from sympathy to medical questions and positive news, but its one-paragraph presentation reduces clarity.
Separate the concern, treatment questions, and cheering-up plan into short informal-letter paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is flexible and appropriate to friendship, injury, and sport, with a few awkward expressions that do not impede meaning.
Use idiomatic phrases such as “make the best of a bad situation,” “may have fractured your leg,” and “once you have recovered.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied sentence structures are generally accurate, although minor errors occur in modal forms, pronoun reference, and participial constructions.
Write “I had better save the questions,” keep references to Brian rather than shifting to generic “you,” and use “once you have recovered.”
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You play sports (e.g. football) for a local team. You recently heard that a player in your team is in a hospital. Write a letter to your teammate. In your letter:
- say how you feel about the news
- ask about the treatment in the hospital
- suggest some ways of cheering him/her up
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.