You recently ordered a small item online but when it arrived, it was damaged. Write a letter to the company that sold you the item. In your letter: - give details about the order you made - explain what was wrong with the item - tell the company what you want them to do about it
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, Five days ago I ordered a headphone from your online store. I was excited when it arrived yesterday but very frustrated to find that the product was damaged. I am not sure if it got damaged during the shipment or was a manufacturing flaw. In either case, I am hoping you will replace it with a fresh one. In relation to the specifics of the order, I purchased this 'Sony MDR-V6 Over the Ear Headphones - Black' through your website called Computer Gadgets on August 18th using my PayPal account. The order number is 5487214 and I am attaching a copy of my receipt. The issue with the headphone is that one swivel air cup was missing, and the play/pause button does not work. I am unable to use it. I’m sure this is either a manufacturing flaw or the product got damaged while shipment. As a solution, and because I really like the model and functionality of the headphone, I am hoping that you will agree to send me another one for free. Otherwise, I would like a full refund and I will be contacting PayPal complaints if I do not hear back from you in regards to this within a week. Thank you for giving the matter your attention and I hope to hear your reply soon. Yours faithfully, Jenny Sahara
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the plural product Original: a headphone Suggested revision: a pair of headphones Why it matters: This item is normally described as a pair of headphones.
- 2. Separate the contrast Original: yesterday but Suggested revision: yesterday, but Why it matters: A comma is needed before 'but' when it joins two independent clauses.
- 3. Request a new pair Original: fresh one Suggested revision: new pair Why it matters: 'Fresh' is not used to describe a replacement electronic product.
- 4. Introduce order details directly Original: In relation to the specifics of the order Suggested revision: Regarding the order Why it matters: This is a clearer and more concise transition to the purchase details.
- 5. Use formal date style Original: 18th Suggested revision: 18 Why it matters: Ordinal endings are unnecessary in a formally written date.
- 6. Keep the product plural Original: headphone Suggested revision: headphones Why it matters: The product is a pair of headphones, so the plural form is required.
- 7. Correct the component name Original: air Suggested revision: ear Why it matters: The headphone component is an ear cup, not an air cup.
- 8. Use the current state Original: was Suggested revision: is Why it matters: The ear cup remains missing when the complaint is written, so present tense is appropriate.
- 9. Avoid unsupported certainty Original: I’m sure Suggested revision: I believe Why it matters: The writer does not know the cause, so a measured phrase is more accurate.
- 10. Correct the shipping phrase Original: while shipment Suggested revision: during shipping Why it matters: 'During' is required before the noun describing the shipping process.
- 11. Link the requested remedy Original: As a solution, Suggested revision: Therefore, Why it matters: This transition connects the damage directly to the requested replacement.
- 12. Describe the product naturally Original: model and functionality of the headphone Suggested revision: model and features of the headphones Why it matters: 'Features' is more natural when referring generally to what the product offers.
Suggested Rewrites
- a headphone a pair of headphones
- yesterday but yesterday, but
- fresh one new pair
- In relation to the specifics of the order Regarding the order
- 18th 18
- headphone headphones
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter clearly identifies the order, documents two specific defects, supplies useful purchase details, and requests either a replacement or refund in an appropriately formal tone. Its main weakness is presentation and language precision: the complaint repeats the possible cause, remains one dense block, and uses awkward phrases such as "a headphone," "fresh one," and "while shipment"; prioritise concise paragraphing and standard customer-service terminology.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully developed with precise order information, clear defects, supporting documentation, and a definite replacement-or-refund request.
Keep the complete evidence but state the preferred remedy once, then give the refund alternative and response deadline concisely.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter follows a sensible order-details-defects-remedy sequence, but it is presented as one block and repeats speculation about the cause of damage.
Use separate paragraphs for purchase details, faults, and requested action, deleting the repeated manufacturing-or-shipping explanation.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary covers ordering, defects, replacement, and refunds effectively, though several noun choices and collocations are unnatural.
Use standard expressions such as "a pair of headphones," "a replacement," "damaged in transit," and "open a PayPal dispute."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A useful range of structures communicates the complaint clearly, but parallelism, prepositions, articles, and punctuation are not consistently controlled.
Revise forms such as "either damaged in transit or affected by a manufacturing defect" and proofread long request sentences for clean coordination.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You recently ordered a small item online but when it arrived, it was damaged. Write a letter to the company that sold you the item. In your letter:
- give details about the order you made
- explain what was wrong with the item
- tell the company what you want them to do about it
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.