You are going to have a family party in a private room in a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter say: - why you need to use this private room - what you need them to provide for the party - inquire about the price of the food you are ordering
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam; I intend to book a party venue at your hotel on 15th December 2023 and writing to inquire about its availability. Besides, I need information about the buffet menu for lunch, some additional facilities and their prices. I and my wife have decided to celebrate our 5th marriage anniversary on 15th December. We are expecting approximately 30 guests and for that, we need a large party hall that comes with a reception area and private facilities. Furthermore, I need some arrangements for that day - a comprehensive buffet menu, anniversary cake with a greeting written on it, elegant decoration, drinks, soft music and some exciting toys for the children. A few of the guests are vegetarians, and we need your buffet to be vegetarian-friendly. Finally, I am expecting you to have some staff members ready to serve the guests. I would be grateful if you could confirm the availability of your venue, and then send me the menu along with the prices for the food and service. I am looking forward to your prompt reply. Yours faithfully, Raymond Joseph
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct salutation punctuation Original: Dear Sir or Madam; Suggested revision: Dear Sir or Madam, Why it matters: A formal salutation should end with a comma rather than a semicolon.
- 2. Add auxiliary verb Original: and writing to inquire Suggested revision: and am writing to inquire Why it matters: The coordinated verb phrase needs 'am' to agree with the subject 'I'.
- 3. Use formal transition Original: Besides Suggested revision: In addition Why it matters: 'In addition' links the second request more naturally in a formal letter.
- 4. Correct pronoun order Original: I and my wife Suggested revision: My wife and I Why it matters: English convention places the other person first and uses the subject pronoun 'I'.
- 5. Use standard phrase Original: 5th marriage anniversary Suggested revision: fifth wedding anniversary Why it matters: 'Wedding anniversary' is the standard expression for this occasion.
- 6. Clarify result link Original: and for that, Suggested revision: , so Why it matters: 'So' expresses the result relationship between the guest number and the need for a large venue more directly.
- 7. Introduce the list clearly Original: some arrangements Suggested revision: the following arrangements Why it matters: This phrase clearly signals the specific list of requested provisions that follows.
- 8. Add article and precision Original: anniversary cake with a greeting written on it Suggested revision: an anniversary cake with a message written on it Why it matters: The singular countable noun needs an article, and 'message' is the natural word for text on a cake.
- 9. Use formal date style Original: 15th Suggested revision: 15 Why it matters: Formal British correspondence conventionally omits the ordinal ending in a written date.
- 10. Use concise noun phrase Original: buffet menu for lunch Suggested revision: lunch buffet menu Why it matters: This noun phrase is more concise and natural in a hotel enquiry.
- 11. Use formal wording Original: comes with Suggested revision: includes Why it matters: 'Includes' is more concise and formal when describing venue facilities.
- 12. Introduce the list correctly Original: for that day - Suggested revision: for that day: Why it matters: A colon correctly introduces the list of requested arrangements.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Sir or Madam; Dear Sir or Madam,
- and writing to inquire and am writing to inquire
- Besides In addition
- I and my wife My wife and I
- 5th marriage anniversary fifth wedding anniversary
- and for that, , so
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter communicates its purpose immediately and gives specific, well-selected details about the anniversary, venue requirements, catering, and prices. The main limitation is occasional grammatical awkwardness in otherwise well-controlled sentences, especially in the opening and subject phrasing. Refine these local errors and organise the requests into clearer paragraphs to produce a more polished formal enquiry.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose is clear and every bullet point is fully addressed with relevant details about the celebration, required facilities, and pricing enquiry.
Clarify whether the private room and the large party hall refer to the same space so the booking requirement is completely unambiguous.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter progresses logically from the booking purpose to venue needs, catering arrangements, staffing, and the request for confirmation.
Group the reason for booking, requested provisions, and price enquiry into separate paragraphs rather than presenting the whole letter as one block.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with appropriate items such as buffet menu, vegetarian-friendly, reception area, and availability.
Use more natural expressions such as fifth wedding anniversary and activities for children to improve idiomatic precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex forms is mostly accurate, though a few conspicuous errors occur in the salutation and opening sentences.
Correct incomplete coordination and subject order by writing I intend to book a venue and am writing to enquire and My wife and I.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are going to have a family party in a private room in a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter say:
- why you need to use this private room
- what you need them to provide for the party
- inquire about the price of the food you are ordering
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.