You work as a part-time employee in a company. The company has recently posted an advertisement seeking a person for a full-time position. You want to apply for this full-time job. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: - introduce yourself and explain why you are writing - express your interest in having this full-time job - explain why you think you are a suitable candidate for the post
Same question Compare all 2 answers See different approaches and band scores for this IELTS task.Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am Stephen Traver, a junior Java programmer at your company. I have been working as a part-timer for the last one and a half years, and have successfully completed more than 6/7 projects so far. Recently, I have noticed a job advertisement on our company website that announces hiring a full-time Java developer. I believe I am eligible for this post and would like you to consider me for this full-time position.
I want to take the opportunity to apply for this full-time position because it would mean a better opportunity for me to contribute more to our company while also being rewarded for my work here. Not to mention a full-time position comes with better remuneration and other facilities which would motivate me to work more dedicatedly.
I believe I am quite eligible for this post because I have delivered all the projects in time during the past one and a half years and I have developed my skills to a great extent during this time. I am flexible about working hours and can work independently or as a part of a team, based on project demand. I am also a multi-tasker and can work under pressure.
So, I am hoping that you would give me the opportunity to start as a full-time Java developer from the next month in our company and allow me to contribute to our projects more closely and dedicatedly.
Yours faithfully,
Stephen Traver
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Address your manager Original: Dear Sir or Madam, Suggested revision: Dear [Manager's Name], Why it matters: Addressing the known manager directly makes the application more appropriately targeted.
- 2. Clarify the number Original: 6/7 projects Suggested revision: six or seven projects Why it matters: The slash makes the number of completed projects ambiguous in a formal letter.
- 3. Complete the clause Original: announces hiring a full-time Java developer Suggested revision: announces that the company is hiring a full-time Java developer Why it matters: The verb announces needs a complete content clause here.
- 4. Use employment vocabulary Original: other facilities Suggested revision: other benefits Why it matters: Benefits is the more precise term for additional compensation attached to a position.
- 5. Use natural phrasing Original: work more dedicatedly Suggested revision: work with greater dedication Why it matters: The revised phrase expresses the intended idea more naturally in formal English.
- 6. Emphasise suitability Original: quite eligible for this post Suggested revision: well suited to this post Why it matters: Well suited describes the candidate's strengths more precisely than eligible.
- 7. Use correct collocation Original: delivered all the projects in time Suggested revision: delivered all the projects on time Why it matters: On time means by the required deadline, whereas in time has a different emphasis.
- 8. Clarify project needs Original: based on project demand Suggested revision: depending on project requirements Why it matters: The revision gives a clearer and more natural account of how the working arrangement is chosen.
- 9. Remove the article Original: from the next month Suggested revision: from next month Why it matters: Next month does not take the definite article in this time expression.
- 10. Prioritise employer value Suggested revision: Condense the personal rewards and foreground how full-time availability would help the company and its projects. Why it matters: The paragraph currently gives more space to the applicant's remuneration than to the manager's reason for appointing them.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Sir or Madam, Dear [Manager's Name],
- 6/7 projects six or seven projects
- announces hiring a full-time Java developer announces that the company is hiring a full-time Java developer
- other facilities other benefits
- work more dedicatedly work with greater dedication
- quite eligible for this post well suited to this post
Why this response received Band 8.0
The letter has a clear purpose, covers every requested point with relevant supporting detail, and maintains a suitably professional tone throughout. Its main limitation is a cluster of slightly unnatural collocations and repeated wording around eligibility and the full-time position; the highest-priority improvement is to choose more idiomatic workplace expressions and streamline repeated claims so the application sounds more polished and persuasive.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The purpose is immediately clear, all three bullet points are fully covered, and the reasons for suitability are developed in a professional register.
Address the manager more personally if their name is known and frame the benefits of the appointment even more strongly around the company's needs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is organised into purposeful paragraphs with clear progression from the application to motivation, suitability, and the requested outcome.
Reduce repetition of phrases such as full-time position and eligible for this post by using tighter referencing between paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The letter uses a good range of relevant workplace vocabulary, though several combinations such as announces hiring and work more dedicatedly are not fully idiomatic.
Prefer natural collocations such as advertised a vacancy, complete projects on time, and work with greater dedication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A varied mix of simple and complex sentences is generally well controlled, with only minor awkwardness and occasional loose construction.
Turn the fragment beginning Not to mention into a complete sentence and review article and preposition choices in phrases such as from next month.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You work as a part-time employee in a company. The company has recently posted an advertisement seeking a person for a full-time position. You want to apply for this full-time job. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter:
- introduce yourself and explain why you are writing
- express your interest in having this full-time job
- explain why you think you are a suitable candidate for the post
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.