During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter: - remind him when and where you met - tell him what kind of job you are interested in - say why you think you would be suitable for the job

Same questionCompare 3 different answers (Band 7–8)

Sample Response

1

Dear Mr Barron, I am Robert Caldwell, who sat next to you on a flight from Brisbane to London on 18 Septemberon September 18th. You offered me your business card after hearing about my enthusiasm for workingenthusiasm to work in a restaurant. I am writing to express mywriting regarding my keen interest in workingkeen interest to work in one of your restaurants as an assistant manager. It was very kind of you to advise me that I should contact you if I ever wantedwant to work in a restaurant. As I mentioned briefly during our delightful conversation, I used to work at a restaurant as an assistant manager and took a break from work to complete my Master's degree. Now that I am ready to return to workwilling to work again, I would like you to consider me as a potential employee in one of your restaurants in Australia—perhapsAustralia - perhaps as an assistant manager. I have worked as an assistant manager in a reputablereputed restaurant in Melbourne for about 3 years, and before that, I was in charge of the customer care department in a retail shop. I have completed a course in hotel management atfrom one of the top management schools in Australia. I am confidentpositive that my skills and expertise will be useful to your organisation. If you have any queries, please contact me at the email address or phone number provided on my curriculum vitaeCurriculum Vitae. Yours sincerely, Robert Caldwell

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The letter’s strongest feature is its convincing fulfilment of all three requirements: it identifies the flight precisely, states the desired role, and supports suitability with relevant management, customer-service, and training experience. Its main limitation is organisation, because the entire letter is presented as one continuous paragraph despite several clear communicative stages. Prioritise dividing it into purposeful paragraphs and refining a few collocations such as ‘interest in working’.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.0
Scoring rule

The purpose and desired position are explicit, and every bullet point is fully developed in a suitably professional register.

Next step

Tighten the repeated references to the assistant-manager role so the application remains concise and focused.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Ideas follow a clear logical sequence, but the absence of paragraph breaks weakens the letter’s organisation and readability.

Next step

Separate the meeting reminder, job request, suitability evidence, and closing contact details into distinct paragraphs.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

The letter uses a broad and effective professional vocabulary, with only occasional awkward combinations such as ‘keen interest to work’ and ‘willing to work again’.

Next step

Use natural collocations such as ‘keen interest in working’ and ‘ready to return to work’.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

A wide range of structures is used accurately and flexibly, with only minor, non-impeding slips.

Next step

Refine the few preposition patterns around ‘interest’ and ‘course’ to make an otherwise controlled letter more polished.

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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter:

- remind him when and where you met

- tell him what kind of job you are interested in

- say why you think you would be suitable for the job

Your response

Words0
20:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.