You use trains to reach the office but the timetable of the train has been changed recently. Also, the train you take to work no longer stops at your station. Write a letter to the railway authority about it. In your letter: - introduce yourself - what problems have been created due to the changes - what you would suggest them to do
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I would like to draw your kind attention that, the train schedule in my area has recently been changed and due to this, many office goers like me are suffering. I am hoping you would keep the previous timetable and introduce more frequent trains for the convenience of the residents. I am a banker and I work as an assistant manager at the City Bank. I regularly commute to my office using your train. Sadly, the train I used to take to reach office no longer stops at our station and as a result, we need to travel a few extra miles to reach the City Centre Station which is overcrowded in the morning hours. I am often late to reach my office and have objections about the revised train timetable. With the introduction of the new train schedule, daily commuting for employees like me has become utterly difficult which ultimately makes your service unreliable. Unfortunately, because of this problem, many commuters are late for their work which is affecting their productivity. Consequently, they are very upset about your service. As a solution to this problem, I would recommend you to revert to the previous schedule and arrange more trains during the peak hours. If it is not possible, then at least add more carriages to increase the space. It will be a great relief if you can resolve this problem as soon as possible. Thank you for giving the matter your attention and I hope to hear your reply soon. Yours faithfully, Campbell Scott
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix attention phrase Original: draw your kind attention that, Suggested revision: draw your attention to the fact that Why it matters: The verb phrase requires "to," and the comma is incorrect.
- 2. Use commuters Original: office goers Suggested revision: commuters Why it matters: "Commuters" is the precise formal term for people travelling to work.
- 3. Describe disruption Original: are suffering Suggested revision: are experiencing serious disruption Why it matters: This states the effect of the timetable change more specifically.
- 4. Use direct request Original: I am hoping you would keep Suggested revision: I hope you will restore Why it matters: The revised verb pattern clearly requests a return to the previous timetable.
- 5. Use by train Original: using your train Suggested revision: by train Why it matters: This is the natural phrase for the mode of transport.
- 6. Add article Original: reach office Suggested revision: reach the office Why it matters: The specified workplace requires the definite article.
- 7. Separate result sentence Original: station and as a result, Suggested revision: station. As a result, Why it matters: A full stop clearly separates the problem from its consequence.
- 8. Use rush hour Original: morning hours Suggested revision: morning rush hour Why it matters: This is the natural term for the busiest commuting period.
- 9. Use late for work Original: late to reach my office Suggested revision: late for work Why it matters: The fixed expression is "late for work."
- 10. Use object to Original: have objections about Suggested revision: object to Why it matters: The verb "object" takes the preposition "to."
- 11. Use commuting Original: daily commuting Suggested revision: commuting Why it matters: Commuting already implies regular travel, so "daily" is unnecessary.
- 12. Use measured wording Original: utterly Suggested revision: extremely Why it matters: This is a more natural collocation in a formal complaint.
Suggested Rewrites
- draw your kind attention that, draw your attention to the fact that
- office goers commuters
- are suffering are experiencing serious disruption
- I am hoping you would keep I hope you will restore
- using your train by train
- reach office reach the office
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter fully addresses the situation, introduces the commuter clearly, explains concrete consequences of the changed service, and proposes several practical remedies in a suitably formal tone. Its main weakness is presentation: the response is lengthy and unparagraphled, while a few awkward collocations reduce polish; prioritise grouping the introduction, problems, and requested actions into concise paragraphs and refining the formal request language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose is immediately clear, all bullet points are fully developed, and the proposed timetable, frequency, and capacity solutions are practical and relevant.
Make the request still more focused by identifying the station and preferred stopping time, then trim repeated comments about commuter dissatisfaction.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence from purpose to personal impact, wider consequences, and solutions is logical, but the single-block format and repetition reduce clarity.
Use separate paragraphs for self-introduction, problems caused, and requested remedies, and remove duplicated statements about lateness and inconvenience.
Lexical Resource
A good range of transport and complaint vocabulary conveys the problem precisely, with only occasional unnatural collocations.
Prefer draw your attention to, late for work, and concerns about the revised timetable rather than the less natural existing phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex structures with generally sound control, despite occasional article, punctuation, and clause-linking errors.
Check comma placement and relative clauses in long sentences, especially where consequences are linked with which.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You use trains to reach the office but the timetable of the train has been changed recently. Also, the train you take to work no longer stops at your station. Write a letter to the railway authority about it. In your letter:
- introduce yourself
- what problems have been created due to the changes
- what you would suggest them to do
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.