You are going on a short course to a training college abroad. It is a college that you have not been to before. Write a letter to the accommodation officer. In your letter: - give details of your course and your arrival/departure date - explain your accommodation needs - ask for information about getting to and from the college

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 6–8)

Sample Response

1

Dear Sir/Madam,

2

I am writing this letter to ask you to provide me with additional informationrequest you to provide me additional information about your collegeCollege hostel as I am looking forward to staying in your hostel accommodation while I am taking my tourism courseowing to my tourism course.

3

To furnish you with more details, I have enrolled in a diploma coursehave taken a diploma in tourism and development in the prestigious college of EdinburghEdinburg this fallfor this fall. Hence I planned my itinerary for arriving next week that is 27/8/2020 and in due course of 4 months will be completing my academic course.

4

In addition to the above, Iit would be grateful if you could allocate me a room with good ventilation; ideally,good ventilation probably a single room would be my preferencethe best preference.moreover as I have many online assignmentsas we have plenty of online submissions a high-speed internet connectionnetwork would be beneficial for me I would also like to know whetheralong with that may I know if the hostel facilities include a laundry servicefacilities in hostel provision include the laundry.

5

As you are aware I’m enrolled in a tourism stream which includes frequent visits to the city it would help me if you could dispense some orientation to go out of the college as I’m naive to the town probably a map would be a better option.

6

Awaiting a positive responsepositive response from your side,

7

Yours faithfullyyours sincerely, Ms.Sandra

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The letter’s clearest strength is its generally appropriate formal tone and useful detail about the course and preferred room facilities. Its main limitation is that the departure timing and travel request are imprecise, while frequent awkward phrasing and run-on sentences reduce clarity. Prioritise stating an exact departure date, asking directly about transport to and from the college, and separating ideas into accurate sentences.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

6.0
Scoring rule

The purpose is clear and all three areas are mentioned, but the departure timing and transport information request are insufficiently precise.

Next step

State the exact departure date and ask directly about available ways to travel to and from the college.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

The paragraph sequence follows the task logically, although several ideas are joined in long, loosely controlled sentences.

Next step

Use shorter sentences and clearer punctuation so each request and supporting detail is easy to follow.

LR

Lexical Resource

5.5
Scoring rule

The vocabulary covers the topic with some range, but frequent collocational choices such as ‘best preference’ and ‘dispense some orientation’ sound unnatural.

Next step

Choose simpler, standard combinations such as ‘prefer a single room’ and ‘provide directions or transport information’.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5
Scoring rule

A mix of structures is attempted, but recurring article, clause, capitalization, and punctuation errors weaken control.

Next step

Divide run-on sentences and check articles, sentence openings, and clause boundaries throughout the letter.

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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1

You are going on a short course to a training college abroad. It is a college that you have not been to before. Write a letter to the accommodation officer. In your letter:

- give details of your course and your arrival/departure date

- explain your accommodation needs

- ask for information about getting to and from the college

Your response

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