You are going on to a month-long training programme in the UK and know that the head of the course would like one of the participants to be the social events’ organiser. Write a letter to the Training Organiser. In your letter: - express your interest in the role - request for more information about it - explain what experience you have
Sample Response
Dear Mr Reynold, I would like to thank you for allowing me to join the month-long training programme that you will be organising. Anyway, I am writing this letter to express my interest to become the social events’ organizer on how to show cultural sensitivity at work as one of the participants in your training programme. In the past, I have volunteered in different social events like organizing a picnic for a huge number of students at my junior college, throwing a welcome party for my company boss after closing a very successful business deal abroad, and organizing a Christmas party for the local community members in my area. I have even helped organize a fundraising event for a local political campaign in my town. So, it is fair to suggest that I do know a few things about organizing social events. By the way, I would like to get some additional information on the events, such as what kinds of guests are expected at the events and how large would be the gathering. I will await your response. Yours sincerely, Paul Nigel
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use programme acceptance phrase Original: allowing me to join Suggested revision: accepting me onto Why it matters: Accept someone onto a programme is the natural formal collocation.
- 2. Correct event collocation Original: volunteered in different social events Suggested revision: volunteered at various social events Why it matters: A person volunteers at events, and various is more formal than different here.
- 3. Use neutral quantity phrase Original: huge Suggested revision: large Why it matters: Large number is more neutral and appropriate in a formal application letter.
- 4. Use event-planning verb Original: throwing Suggested revision: organising Why it matters: Organising emphasizes the relevant planning experience more precisely than throwing.
- 5. Use professional role term Original: my company boss Suggested revision: my manager Why it matters: Manager is the standard professional term; company boss is informal and redundant.
- 6. Remove unnecessary intensifier Original: a very successful business deal Suggested revision: a successful business deal Why it matters: Successful already gives the relevant positive result, so very is unnecessary.
- 7. Use British spelling Original: organizing Suggested revision: organising Why it matters: Organising is the British spelling expected in this IELTS context.
- 8. Remove redundant locality Original: local community members in my area Suggested revision: members of my local community Why it matters: The revision avoids repeating local and in my area.
- 9. Use British spelling Original: organize Suggested revision: organise Why it matters: Organise is the British spelling used in the task context.
- 10. Link experience directly Original: So, it is fair to suggest Suggested revision: These experiences show Why it matters: The replacement creates a direct formal link from the examples to the writer's suitability.
- 11. State experience professionally Original: I do know a few things about organizing social events Suggested revision: I have substantial experience in organising social events Why it matters: The original phrase is informal and understates the evidence already provided.
- 12. Use courteous closing Original: I will await your response Suggested revision: I look forward to your response Why it matters: The replacement sounds warmer and more conventional in a formal request letter.
Suggested Rewrites
- allowing me to join accepting me onto
- volunteered in different social events volunteered at various social events
- huge large
- throwing organising
- my company boss my manager
- a very successful business deal a successful business deal
Why this response received Band 6.5
The letter addresses all three requirements and supports the application with a substantial range of event-organising experience, which is its strongest feature. Its main limitation is an overly casual, sometimes self-congratulatory register, while the information request focuses narrowly on guests and gathering size rather than duties, budget, schedule, or support. The priority is to present the experience concisely and ask practical questions that demonstrate readiness to perform the role.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Interest, relevant experience, and information requests are all present, but the requested details are narrow and the tone is not consistently professional.
Ask about responsibilities, event frequency, budget, available support, and expected guest profiles, then link the strongest prior experience directly to those duties.
Coherence and Cohesion
The content moves from interest to experience and questions, but one long paragraph and informal transitions weaken the organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for the application, two or three strongest experience examples, and specific questions about the role.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range to discuss events and experience, though phrases such as 'Anyway', 'By the way', and 'do know a few things' weaken precision and formality.
Use professional expressions such as 'I wish to apply', 'relevant experience', 'could you clarify', and 'number of attendees'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied sentence forms and remains clear, but long clauses, prepositions, and indirect-question word order contain recurring errors.
Correct forms such as 'interest in becoming', 'the seminar on cultural sensitivity', and 'how large the gatherings will be'.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are going on to a month-long training programme in the UK and know that the head of the course would like one of the participants to be the social events’ organiser. Write a letter to the Training Organiser. In your letter:
- express your interest in the role
- request for more information about it
- explain what experience you have
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.