People living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than those in previous times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Nowadays, people’s quality of life has tremendously improved compared to the previous centuries. The essential factors for this change are advancements in technology, improved infrastructure and various initiatives taken by the government to bring up citizens’ living standards. In my opinion, I strongly agree with this statement.
Admittedly, the upgraded infrastructure helps people lead a quality living. Better transportation facilities which were enhanced through technological advancements, have reduced travelling time to a great extent and improved the connectivity between various destinations. Such conveniences were not benefited by the people who lived some decades ago. For example, in the past, people spent months on sea voyages to commute to another country, but now it takes only a few hours to reach any corner of the world thanks to the high frequency of air flights. In addition, the condition of the food is being constantly monitored by the government in order to cater better quality food to every citizen. Still, some argue that the food consumed by our ancestors was more nutritious than now.
Furthermore, the development in medical services aided people to live longer, and various threatening diseases can be easily identified and cured as a consequence of advanced technological methods and innovative devices. For instance, the fatality rate of infectious viral infections such as measles and polio was significantly higher in the previous century, however, nowadays, these are entirely eradicated from the planet. While newer diseases continue to emerge from time to time, modern medicine can cure many of them, improving humankind’s quality of life.
In conclusion, humans in the modern era are experiencing a superior aspect of life to the ones who lived in previous centuries. Undoubtedly, as technology grows, there have been constant developments in every field to make living more manageable and more pleasant for everyone.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use correct collocation Original: bring up citizens’ living standards Suggested revision: raise citizens’ living standards Why it matters: Living standards are “raised,” while “bring up” is not natural in this context.
- 2. Use natural expression Original: lead a quality living Suggested revision: enjoy a good quality of life Why it matters: “Enjoy a good quality of life” is the idiomatic expression.
- 3. Remove unnecessary comma Original: advancements, have Suggested revision: advancements have Why it matters: A comma should not separate the subject from its main verb.
- 4. Fix passive construction Original: were not benefited by the people Suggested revision: were not available to people Why it matters: Conveniences are available to people; people are not the agents benefiting them.
- 5. Choose accurate verb Original: commute Suggested revision: travel Why it matters: “Commute” usually describes regular travel between home and work or study.
- 6. Remove redundancy Original: air flights Suggested revision: flights Why it matters: A flight already refers to air travel in this context.
- 7. Use precise phrase Original: the condition of the food Suggested revision: food quality Why it matters: “Food quality” states the intended concept directly and naturally.
- 8. Fix verb collocation Original: cater better quality food to Suggested revision: provide better-quality food for Why it matters: “Provide food for” is the appropriate construction for supplying citizens.
- 9. Fix tense and preposition Original: the development in medical services aided people to live longer Suggested revision: the development of medical services has helped people live longer Why it matters: The present perfect connects the historical development to its continuing effect, and “development of” is the natural phrase.
- 10. Use precise modifier Original: various threatening diseases Suggested revision: various life-threatening diseases Why it matters: “Life-threatening” clearly conveys that the diseases may cause death.
- 11. Fix comma splice Original: previous century, however, nowadays Suggested revision: previous century; however, nowadays Why it matters: A semicolon is needed before the conjunctive adverb joining two independent clauses.
- 12. Clarify comparison Original: a superior aspect of life Suggested revision: a higher quality of life Why it matters: “Quality of life” is the established expression for the comparison being made.
Suggested Rewrites
- bring up citizens’ living standards raise citizens’ living standards
- lead a quality living enjoy a good quality of life
- advancements, have advancements have
- were not benefited by the people were not available to people
- commute travel
- air flights flights
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay maintains a clear position and develops it through logically organized examples concerning transport and healthcare. Its main weakness is occasional imprecision in claims and phrasing, including an absolute statement about disease eradication and several unnatural collocations. The highest-priority improvement is to qualify factual claims and express comparisons in more precise, idiomatic language while preserving the strong overall progression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear agreement is maintained and supported with developed reasons, though the food point is brief and one medical claim is overstated.
Develop each supporting point evenly and qualify factual claims so that the argument remains convincing and accurate.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through well-focused paragraphs, with generally effective referencing and linking despite a few abrupt additions.
Integrate secondary points more smoothly so that every sentence clearly advances its paragraph's central idea.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of topic vocabulary, although several collocations and comparative expressions are awkward or imprecise.
Refine phrases about living standards, transport, food quality, and comparison to make the wording more natural and exact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex structures are generally well controlled, but errors in passive construction, punctuation, and clause joining occur noticeably.
Check passive forms and punctuation around relative and contrast clauses to improve grammatical consistency.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
People living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than those in previous times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.