People’s lives are now surrounded by advertisement. This affects what people consider important and has a negative impact on people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 7–8)

Sample Response

1

In today’s consumer-driven world, advertising pervadesinfiltrates nearly every aspect of our lives—from social media feeds to public spaces. I strongly agree that this constant exposure not only influences people’s perceptionsperception of what matters but also has detrimental effects on their well-being and values.

2

FirstFirstly, advertising shapes people’s priorities by promoting materialism and unrealistic standards. Luxury brands, for instance, often associate success with expensive products, making people believe that owning such items is the key to happiness or social acceptance. As a result, individuals may prioritise wealth and appearance over meaningful aspects such as personal growth or relationshipsmeaningful aspects like personal growth or relationships.

3

Furthermore, constant exposure to advertising fostersconstant advertising fosters dissatisfaction and impulsive spending. People are frequently made to feel inadequate unless they purchase the latest gadgets, clothes, or beauty products. This relentless push to consume leads to financial strain, especially among younger people, who are more vulnerableyounger generations who are more vulnerable to persuasive marketing techniques.

4

Admittedly, advertising playshas a role in informing consumers about new products or services. However, this informative function is often overshadowed by manipulative tacticshas been overshadowed by manipulative tactics designed to exploit emotions and desires, often to the detriment of mental health and overallgenuine life satisfaction.

5

In conclusion, I firmly believe that the pervasive nature of advertising distorts what people consider valuable and harms societycontributes negatively to society by promoting superficiality and excessive consumerism.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response is notably fluent and well organised, with a consistent position and precise language used to explain materialism, dissatisfaction, and impulsive spending. Its principal limitation is the restricted development caused by the short length, as several claims remain broadly asserted rather than explored with specific consequences or evidence. The priority is to extend each central idea with a concrete illustration and deeper explanation while preserving the current focus.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The response directly answers the question with a clear position and relevant main ideas, but its below-minimum length limits depth of development.

Next step

Add specific evidence or a fuller causal explanation to each main argument so the response reaches the expected length substantively.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.0
Scoring rule

The argument progresses smoothly through well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices guide the reader without drawing undue attention.

Next step

Strengthen the connection between the two main negative effects by showing how distorted priorities can lead to dissatisfaction and spending.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is varied, precise, and well controlled, including effective expressions for materialism, manipulation, and consumer behaviour.

Next step

Extend the lexical range further through more specific language for the social and psychological consequences of pervasive advertising.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

A wide range of complex structures is used accurately and naturally, with punctuation and sentence control consistently supporting clarity.

Next step

Maintain this accuracy while adding more elaborated supporting sentences and varied forms of causal explanation.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

People’s lives are now surrounded by advertisement. This affects what people consider important and has a negative impact on people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your response

Words0
40:00

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