In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
In some countries, there are laws prohibiting companies from rejecting job applicants based on age. While there may be arguments against such policies, I believe this is a positive development for several reasons.
There are certain arguments against these laws. Firstly, it is claimed that organizations should have the freedom to select candidates based on their perceived suitability for the role, including factors associated with ageincluding age-related factors. The United States Senate, for instance, requires each of its elected officials to be at least 35 years of age, owing to its status as the more senior and deliberative chambermore prestigious and experienced chamber in the United States Congress. ConverselyInversely, some companies might favor younger candidates over their older counterparts, for younger candidates may havethe youth may be accompanied with more energy, adaptability, and familiarity with technology, which are essential in certain industries. Older candidatesOlder candidates for the job, in contrast, are more likely to face health issues, which could affect their productivity and increase company costs related to healthcare and insurance.
However, banning age-based discrimination at work has several advantages, making it a positive development. FirstInitially, it would promote fairness and ensure that all individuals, regardless of age, are equally considered for employment opportunities based on their skills and qualifications. This helps to combat stereotypes and biases against older workers, who often possess valuable experience and knowledge, which could compensate for their perceived lack of energy. Age diversityHaving age diversity in the workplace can alsoworkplace, furthermore, can foster innovation and improve problem-solving by combining the perspectives of different generations. A workforce that successfully blends youthful enthusiasm with mature wisdomblends both youthful enthusiasm and mature wisdom would create a more dynamic and efficient workplaceproduce a more dynamic and efficient environment, benefiting both the company and its employees.
In conclusion, while some may argue that age is a relevant factor in hiring, prohibiting age-based discrimination offers substantial benefitscarries prominent benefits, and therefore, such a policy is likely to be a positive development. It is recommended that organizations encourage age diversity in the workplace to foster a well-informed and innovative work environment.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response is strongest in its clear position and well-developed explanation of how age diversity can promote fairness and workplace effectiveness. Its main limitation is that the opposing case receives disproportionate space and includes a Senate example that does not closely match company hiring. Prioritise sharper selection of directly relevant evidence and develop the positive case with one concrete workplace example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response maintains a clear positive position and develops relevant benefits, although one counterexample is only loosely connected to company recruitment.
Replace the Senate example with a specific workplace case and extend the explanation of how anti-discrimination laws benefit employers.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, opposing view, supporting case, and conclusion, with generally effective paragraphing.
Use transitions such as 'inversely' and 'initially' more naturally and make the shift from concession to main argument more economical.
Lexical Resource
A broad and mostly precise vocabulary supports nuanced discussion, despite several awkward collocations and word choices.
Refine collocations such as 'prominent benefits' and 'the youth may be accompanied with more energy' to sound more idiomatic.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex structures with strong control, and the few grammatical slips do not impede meaning.
Polish article, preposition, and agreement choices in longer sentences to make the language consistently accurate.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.