In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
In certain countries, employers are legally prohibited from discriminating against job applicants on the basis of age. In my view, although the policy aims to foster fairness and equal opportunity, the potential drawbacks in real-world application may outweigh its intended benefits.
It is true that banning age-based discrimination can promote fairness and equal opportunity in the labour market. One key advantage is that it encourages a diverse and inclusive workforce. Applicants of different ages—whether younger or older—can offer unique skills, experiences, and perspectives that enhance workplace collaboration. As a result, fair hiring practices help build stronger team dynamics and foster innovation. Another benefit is that this policy helps reduce social inequality, particularly for older individuals. Many experienced professionals, for instance, are unfairly rejected due to age, even when they possess valuable expertise. By protecting them from discrimination, anti-age laws allow for extended careers and improved financial security later in life.
However, enforcing such regulations may come with practical limitations which undermine their intended benefits.. One notable issue is that employers might still find indirect ways to discriminate. Bias can persist during interviews, or companies may use coded language in job advertisements to subtly exclude certain age groups. Consequently, legal protection alone may not be sufficient to eliminate age-related prejudice in hiring practices. Another concern is that certain jobs have physical requirements that may not align with all applicants' capabilities. For example, roles involving manual labour or high physical endurance may be less suitable for older candidates. In such cases, mandatory inclusion could result in mismatches between workers and job demands, potentially affecting performance and safety.
In conclusion, while making age-based discrimination illegal in hiring is a positive step toward fairness and equality, its effectiveness is limited by enforcement challenges and the persistence of implicit bias.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Refine policy wording Original: potential drawbacks in real-world application Suggested revision: potential drawbacks in practical implementation Why it matters: 'Implementation' is the more precise term for putting a policy into practice.
- 2. Clarify the reference Original: One key advantage is that it encourages Suggested revision: One key advantage is that this ban encourages Why it matters: Naming the ban makes the pronoun reference more immediate and precise.
- 3. Remove redundant contrast Original: Applicants of different ages—whether younger or older— Suggested revision: Applicants of different ages Why it matters: 'Different ages' already includes younger and older applicants.
- 4. Use experience collectively Original: experiences Suggested revision: experience Why it matters: 'Experience' is more naturally uncountable when referring generally to professional background.
- 5. Tighten the transition Original: Another benefit is that this policy helps reduce Suggested revision: The policy also helps reduce Why it matters: The shorter transition links the additional benefit without a wordy frame.
- 6. Name the laws precisely Original: anti-age laws Suggested revision: laws against age discrimination Why it matters: The revision states the legal protection more precisely and formally.
- 7. Use an active structure Original: allow for extended careers Suggested revision: allow them to extend their careers Why it matters: The active construction identifies who benefits and is more natural in this sentence.
- 8. Fix relative clause punctuation Original: practical limitations which undermine their intended benefits.. Suggested revision: practical limitations that undermine their intended benefits. Why it matters: A restrictive 'that' clause fits the meaning, and only one full stop is required.
- 9. Express capability directly Original: physical requirements that may not align with all applicants' capabilities Suggested revision: physical requirements that not all applicants can meet Why it matters: People meet requirements, so the revision expresses the relationship more naturally.
- 10. Use natural collocation Original: high Suggested revision: great Why it matters: 'Great endurance' is the more natural collocation for a high level of stamina.
Suggested Rewrites
- potential drawbacks in real-world application potential drawbacks in practical implementation
- One key advantage is that it encourages One key advantage is that this ban encourages
- Applicants of different ages—whether younger or older— Applicants of different ages
- experiences experience
- Another benefit is that this policy helps reduce The policy also helps reduce
- anti-age laws laws against age discrimination
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay is highly coherent and uses precise, varied language to explore both the fairness benefits and practical limitations of anti-discrimination laws. Its main weakness is that the introduction says the drawbacks may outweigh the benefits, whereas the conclusion describes the law as a positive development, leaving the final judgement inconsistent; some supposed drawbacks also concern imperfect enforcement rather than harm caused by the policy. Clarify one position and make every argument directly prove it.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Relevant ideas are extensively developed on both sides, but the overall judgement shifts between a negative stance in the introduction and a positive one in the conclusion.
Choose one final evaluation and ensure each limitation demonstrates why the policy itself is positive or negative rather than merely difficult to enforce.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is easy to follow, with focused paragraphs, clear sequencing, and well-managed cohesive links throughout.
Add an explicit weighing sentence before the conclusion so the progression from the two sides to the final judgement is fully transparent.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is flexible, precise, and natural across the topic, with only occasional wording that misrepresents the policy’s effect.
Use exact legal language and avoid terms suggesting that anti-discrimination rules require employers to hire unsuitable candidates.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled with strong accuracy and control, aside from an isolated punctuation slip.
Proofread final punctuation carefully while preserving the current variety and control of sentence structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.