In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 8)
Same-task comparison

This response is estimated at Band 8.0. Can you write a better one?

Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.

  • Closest to official scores
  • What to fix on each criterion
  • Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Start writing this task

Sample Response

1

The possibility of a future where cash will no longer be accepted in shops as a payment methodaccepted at stores as a payment method has long been widely debateda subject of intense debate. In this essay, we will explore why such a scenario is plausible and whywhy such a scenario is plausible, and the potential reasons why some individuals may be reluctant to abandon the use of cash.

2

The rapid advancement of technology and changing consumer preferences make it increasingly plausible that cashless transactions will dominate in the future. With the rise of digital payment methods, such as cards and mobile payments, cash transactions have already seen a decline in many parts of the world. Scandinavian countries, such as Sweden, have made significant strides towardsin becoming cashless societies. Many establishments, including public transportation and small businesses, now only accept digital payments. The convenience, speed, and security offered by cashless transactions have led to a seamless and efficient payment experience for both consumers and businesses. It validates the forecast that we will indeed live in a cashless society in the future.

3

Despite the potential benefits of a cashless society, some people may be hesitant to abandon the use of cash for various reasonsdue to various reasons. One significant concern is concerns about privacy and data securitythe issue of privacy and data security. Digital transactions leave a trail of personal information, raising concernsapprehensions about data breaches and unauthorized access to sensitive financial details. In some countries, particularly among the older population, there is a sense of mistrust towards digital platforms and fear of falling victim to cyber fraud. For these individuals, cash offers a tangible and anonymous mode of payment, providing a sense of security and control over their financial transactions. Additionally, cashless systems may inadvertently exclude individuals who do not have access to digital technology or who face barriers to technology adoption, leading to concerns of financial exclusion and marginalisation.

4

In conclusion, the transition to a cashless society seems inevitable given the rapid pace of technological advancements. However, some individuals may be reluctant to embrace this change due to concerns surrounding data privacy and potential financial exclusion.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response fully addresses both questions with a clear position, relevant examples, and consistently controlled, precise language. Its main limitation is that a few claims about the inevitability and security of cashless payment are stated somewhat broadly, while several phrases sound formulaic. The highest-priority improvement is to qualify these claims and connect the supporting example more explicitly to why a completely cashless future is likely.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

8.0
Scoring rule

Both questions are answered directly through a clear prediction and well-developed reasons for resistance to cashlessness.

Next step

Qualify the claim of inevitability and explain more precisely how the Sweden example supports a universal future trend.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.0
Scoring rule

Ideas progress logically through a focused introduction, two well-organised body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion.

Next step

Make the reference in “It validates the forecast” more explicit to strengthen the connection between the example and the inference.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

A wide and precise vocabulary supports nuanced discussion of technology, privacy, security, and financial exclusion.

Next step

Replace slightly formulaic or imprecise combinations such as “due to various reasons” with more direct phrasing.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

A broad range of complex structures is used accurately, with only rare awkwardness that does not impede meaning.

Next step

Refine article, reference, and clause choices in the few slightly awkward sentences to make the prose more natural.