In the past children were taught how to save money, but today they only learn how to spend it. Do you agree?
Sample Response
It is often claimedheard that nowadays children know how to spend money but not how to save itknow only how to spend money, but not to save it. Older people, in particular,Mostly, elderly people have this opinion, whereas younger peoplethe young generation argues that children are taught both to save and to spendtaught to save as well as spend.
Those who believe that there has been no change that children are taught to save money nowadays also have a number of examples to point out. For instance, in many countries, especially in the West, children are encouraged to save money by depositingsave money in the form of depositing whatever they earn in special bank accounts opened for them by their parentsbank accounts opened exclusively for children by their parents. In addition, at present children are more aware of what they want to become in their life, what dreams to be fulfilled and the financial needs of those goals.
HoweverOn the contrary, it is quite obvious that compared to previous generations, there has been a new emphasisstress on spending, primarily due to changes in people’s lifestylesthe lifestyle of people. As part of this new lifestyle, children get numerous messagesumpteen number of clues on how to spend freelyenough and live in the present rather than save money for future needsthe future needs. Furthermore, consumerism combined with the widespread availability of credit plays a majorbig role in ensuring that whatever is earned is spentwhatever earned is spent. Most importantly, the consumer market aimed solely at children’s needspurely dedicated to the needs of children is ever growing so that even if children are taught to save money, they may struggle to do sowouldn’t be able to do so.
To sum up, I would argue that children nowadays are not taught enough about saving moneynot taught enough to save money or controlling their spending; instead,and control their spending and instead they are actually encouraged to spend more.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay presents relevant arguments about both saving and spending and ends with a clear view, while its paragraph structure makes the discussion easy to follow. The main limitation is that the position emerges late and some claims are generalized or insufficiently explained. The highest priority is to state the opinion in the introduction and develop each body paragraph with a more precise explanation of how its evidence supports that view.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the issue and gives a clear final opinion, but the initial position is ambiguous and several supporting claims need fuller justification.
State the degree of agreement at the outset and connect each example directly to whether contemporary children are taught to save or spend.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are organised into clear paragraphs with generally logical progression, though some transitions are mechanical or not fully accurate.
Use more precise logical transitions and ensure each paragraph begins with a claim that directly advances the central position.
Lexical Resource
There is adequate vocabulary for discussing finance and consumerism, but awkward collocations and occasional imprecise wording recur.
Replace expressions such as excessive clues or stress on spending with natural, exact language about advertising, consumption, and financial habits.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex structures, but errors in articles, clause construction, and verb patterns appear regularly.
Check that every dependent clause has a complete grammatical structure and revise article use and verb complementation throughout.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In the past children were taught how to save money, but today they only learn how to spend it. Do you agree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.