Some people think that cities are the best places to live. Others prefer to live in a rural area. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city to living in the countryside.
Sample Response
Our earth is home to around six billion people living all around the globe, many of them are urbanites and other ruralites. One line of thought of society states that it’s beneficial to live in urban areas, however, others stand opposite to it. But this thought is gyrated by many reasons. The urban society provides great means of basic amenities necessary for living life. We can find lot schools and other education institutions in cities where the tiny tots make their future and turn into better future civilians. On the contrary, the students from villages come to the cities to have the education. Health facilities are also found in abundance in urban areas. Whenever the people in a rural area have any serious health issues rush to the urban areas to avail these facilities. Apart from this, the vast amount of transports facilities has made life immensely easy to live in urban areas. On the flipside, the villagers have great difficulty in transport as proper means are not present and if present the roads are not proper to run them as they are never properly sanitised. The facilities of shopping malls and supermarkets have helped to gain access to necessary items under one roof easily decreasing our time utility. However, if take a glance at rural society, we will be able to find lush green fields, fresh air and pure environment which is highly polluted in the cities. The villagers have a healthy lifestyle which is very scant in urban areas. People of rural areas are more socialised whereas that of urban areas are mammon worshippers, always running to make both ends meet. Parents of urban society have very less time due to which they are slowly drifted in oblivion, whereas the children of rural society share a great bond with their parents. The crime rate is far less in rural parts as compared to urban where crime is found in every nook and corner of the society. At last keeping all the aspects in mind, we can conclude that living in any part has both benefits and drawbacks, however, it’s totally subjective choice that which society cater our needs better.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural phrasing Original: One line of thought of society Suggested revision: One view in society Why it matters: The original phrase is not an idiomatic way to introduce a common opinion.
- 2. Fix comma splice Original: urban areas, however, others Suggested revision: urban areas; however, others Why it matters: A semicolon correctly joins the two independent clauses around the conjunctive adverb.
- 3. Use clear expression Original: stand opposite to it Suggested revision: hold the opposite view Why it matters: The revision states the contrast in idiomatic academic English.
- 4. Remove unnecessary article Original: The urban society Suggested revision: Urban society Why it matters: Society is used here as a general concept and does not require the definite article.
- 5. Correct the collocation Original: great means of basic amenities Suggested revision: a wide range of basic amenities Why it matters: The revision uses the appropriate quantifying phrase for amenities.
- 6. Avoid awkward repetition Original: living Suggested revision: daily Why it matters: Daily life expresses the intended meaning naturally and concisely.
- 7. Add correct quantifier Original: lot Suggested revision: many Why it matters: The plural count noun requires many or a lot of.
- 8. Use adjective form Original: education Suggested revision: educational Why it matters: Educational is the correct adjective to modify institutions.
- 9. Use formal noun Original: the tiny tots Suggested revision: children Why it matters: Tiny tots is too informal for an academic essay.
- 10. Correct the collocation Original: make their future Suggested revision: prepare for their future Why it matters: Prepare for their future is the natural expression for developing future prospects.
- 11. Clarify intended meaning Original: better future civilians Suggested revision: better-informed citizens Why it matters: The revision gives a clear and natural description of the educational outcome.
- 12. Use logical transition Original: On the contrary, the students Suggested revision: Consequently, students Why it matters: The movement of village students to cities follows from the stated advantage rather than contradicting it.
Suggested Rewrites
- One line of thought of society One view in society
- urban areas, however, others urban areas; however, others
- stand opposite to it hold the opposite view
- The urban society Urban society
- great means of basic amenities a wide range of basic amenities
- living daily
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response’s strongest aspect is its broad coverage of relevant contrasts, including urban services and transport alongside rural air quality, social ties, and lower crime. Its main limitation is that the entire comparison is packed into one paragraph and expressed through frequent unnatural or inaccurate language, which weakens development and clarity. The highest priority is to organise each side into focused paragraphs and explain fewer comparisons more precisely.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses advantages and disadvantages on both sides with several relevant comparisons, but many points remain generalised, stereotyped, or briefly asserted.
Select two major contrasts, such as services and quality of life, and develop each with balanced explanation rather than listing numerous claims.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence broadly moves from city amenities to rural benefits, but one dense paragraph, frequent switches, and run-on connections weaken progression.
Use an introduction, separate city and countryside paragraphs, and a conclusion, with each paragraph built around a clear comparative focus.
Lexical Resource
The writer attempts a wide range of topic vocabulary, but frequent misuse and strained collocations make several descriptions imprecise or unnatural.
Prefer accurate phrases such as “educational institutions”, “public transport”, “reduce travel time”, and “have little free time” over forced wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in sentence boundaries, articles, agreement, missing subjects, and relative structures reduce grammatical control and sometimes strain meaning.
Write shorter complete sentences first, ensuring every clause has a subject and verb before combining ideas with conjunctions or relative pronouns.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that cities are the best places to live. Others prefer to live in a rural area. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city to living in the countryside.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.