Nowadays, more and more people are having consumer goods like refrigerators and washing machines. Does this development bring more advantages than disadvantages?
Sample Response
It is a fact that more families these days have household applianceselectronic households such as freezerssuch freezers, vacuum cleaners, hair dryers, room heaters, water heaters and washing machinesvacuum cleaner, hair dryer, room heater, water heater and laundry machines than ever before. This trend has some positive and negative aspects, but Iaspects but I personally believe that it has more disadvantages than advantages and this is due to the environmental damage they cause.
It is noticed that the number of families that have consumer goods in their homesat their home has increased rapidly in the past few years. The main reason for this trend isreason behind this trend is because of people's busy lifestylespeople’s busy lifestyle. They have less time to complete their household choresdo their household activities and therefore, they relytherefore they are relying on their electronic devices. For example, city residentspeople who are busy with their workworks are relying on their microwave ovens and cookerstheir microwave oven and cooker to prepare their mealsfor preparing their meals. The oven could be utilised for preparing instant food thereby saving them timewhich would save some time for them. Therefore, some people believe that the use of household appliancesexistence of electronic household devices offers them many benefitsbrings a lot of benefits for them.
On the other hand, another group of people believe that it is not a good trend because they think that these devices could have some negative effects on the human body. For instance, devices such as microwave ovens or refrigerators produce radiation that could poseresult a serious threat to the human body. In such cases, the use of microwave ovensusage of microwave oven can cause serious diseaseshas triggered serious diseases such as tumour and cancer. Another example would be about the usage of CFC as it is used in electronic products such as air conditioner and freezer. Many people do not realise that the usage of CFC has a fatal effect on the environment, as it triggers global warming. No doubt the modern electronic devices that we use daily have made our life easier and brought many luxuries in our life but the damagedamages those devices cause is a big threat toin our existence.
In conclusion, it is true that the number of people who own electronic household devices has grown significantly in the past few years. In spite of all the benefits, I personally believe that this trend has more drawbacks for our livesit has more drawbacks for our life, as these electronic products could have some serious effects on our body and the environment as well.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay presents a clear judgement and explains the convenience of household appliances before considering possible environmental and health disadvantages. Its organisation is easy to follow, but the main case depends on unsupported or inaccurate claims that ordinary microwave ovens and refrigerators cause cancer and that CFC use directly triggers global warming; frequent language errors also reduce authority. Prioritise credible evidence about energy consumption, emissions, electronic waste, and resource use.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses advantages and disadvantages and maintains a clear position, but its principal negative arguments rely on questionable factual claims.
Replace radiation and cancer assertions with defensible disadvantages such as electricity demand, manufacturing emissions, repair waste, and disposal of old appliances.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and a logical movement from convenience to disadvantages and conclusion support overall progression, despite some repetition.
Use explicit comparative weighing in the final body paragraph rather than repeating that appliances have both benefits and harms.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficient for appliances and environmental effects, but inaccurate word forms, collocations, and repeated usage reduce precision.
Use household appliances, busy schedules, rely on, pose a threat, energy consumption, refrigerants, environmental damage, and quality of life.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writer attempts varied structures, but errors in articles, agreement, prepositions, countable nouns, and relative clauses recur while meaning stays clear.
Check noun phrases and verb complements, especially household appliances such as, busy with their work, result in, damage caused by devices, and a threat to existence.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, more and more people are having consumer goods like refrigerators and washing machines. Does this development bring more advantages than disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.