In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?
Same question Compare all 3 answers See different approaches and band scores for this IELTS task.Sample Response
[it is essential to leave the countryside intact.]
The issue of building new homes in the countryside, which is often the only space left for building more houses, is contentious. There is indeed a pressing need for new housing in many areas, but the preservation of rural landscapes is also important. In my opinion, it is essential to leave the countryside intact.
To begin with, the countryside is not just a picturesque backdrop; it serves vital ecological and agricultural functions. The destruction of natural habitats and farmland can have far-reaching consequences for local ecosystems and food production. For instance, agricultural expansion is a major driver of deforestation and other ecological destruction, decimating habitats and biodiversity. One example is the displacement of lowland forests in Indonesia due to oil palm cultivation, and the damage caused to the Cerrado and Atlantic Forests of Brazil and Paraguay through soy production. These unsustainable farming practices and the loss of forests result in severe erosion.
Moreover, the rural landscape is an integral part of our cultural heritage and identity. It is therefore crucial that any development in these areas is undertaken with great care and sensitivity. In Italy, rural landscapes hold great significance as a part of the country's cultural heritage. As a result, the authorities have implemented measures to safeguard and promote these landscapes as valuable resources. The approach involves preserving physical locations, sharing knowledge, sustainable management, effective communication, and the transmission of associated heritage values. Unfortunately, constructing additional buildings to support the growing population would make these initiatives unfeasible.
In conclusion, while there is a clear need for new homes in many areas to support the growing population, it is essential that we do not sacrifice the countryside in the process.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Delete stray bracketed line Original: [it is essential to leave the countryside intact.] Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This isolated bracketed sentence duplicates the thesis and appears to be an editing remnant.
- 2. Avoid repetitive wording Original: space left for building more houses Suggested revision: space available for further housing Why it matters: The revision avoids repeating “building” and “houses” from the same sentence.
- 3. Sharpen balancing phrase Original: the preservation of rural landscapes is also important Suggested revision: preserving rural landscapes must also be considered Why it matters: The revision states the competing consideration more directly.
- 4. Vary repeated noun Original: other ecological destruction Suggested revision: other environmental damage Why it matters: The revision avoids repeating “destruction” from the preceding sentence while preserving the meaning.
- 5. Clarify parallel effects Original: decimating habitats and biodiversity Suggested revision: destroying habitats and reducing biodiversity Why it matters: The two verbs specify the different effects on habitats and biodiversity more precisely.
- 6. Remove unnecessary comma Original: , and the damage caused Suggested revision: and the damage caused Why it matters: The comma should not separate the two coordinated examples governed by the same opening clause.
- 7. Use direct cause marker Original: through soy production Suggested revision: by soy production Why it matters: “By” expresses the stated cause more directly.
- 8. Tighten significance phrase Original: hold great significance as a part of Suggested revision: are highly significant as part of Why it matters: The revision is more concise and removes the heavy “hold significance” construction.
- 9. Make list parallel Original: preserving physical locations, sharing knowledge, sustainable management, effective communication, and the transmission of associated heritage values Suggested revision: preserving physical locations, sharing knowledge, managing them sustainably, communicating effectively, and transmitting associated heritage values Why it matters: Every item in the series should use a parallel gerund phrase.
- 10. Use precise consequence Original: make these initiatives unfeasible Suggested revision: undermine these initiatives Why it matters: “Undermine” more directly describes weakening the preservation measures.
Suggested Rewrites
- [it is essential to leave the countryside intact.] Delete
- space left for building more houses space available for further housing
- the preservation of rural landscapes is also important preserving rural landscapes must also be considered
- other ecological destruction other environmental damage
- decimating habitats and biodiversity destroying habitats and reducing biodiversity
- , and the damage caused and the damage caused
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response presents a firm, consistent position and develops ecological and cultural reasons in polished, well-organised language. Its main limitation is evidential relevance: examples about palm-oil and soy agriculture demonstrate environmental damage but do not directly show the effects of building homes, while the duplicated bracketed opening is distracting. Replace the agricultural case with housing-specific evidence about habitat loss, farmland reduction, infrastructure expansion, or rural heritage to make the argument fully persuasive.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The position is clear and supported by two substantial reasons, but the principal environmental examples concern agricultural expansion rather than the proposed housing development.
Use a directly relevant example showing how new residential construction would damage farmland, habitats, or rural character.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is logically sequenced and purposefully paragraphed, with smooth progression from environmental functions to cultural heritage and conclusion.
Remove the isolated bracketed thesis before the introduction so the opening begins cleanly and avoids unnecessary duplication.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is extensive, precise, and naturally controlled across environmental, agricultural, and cultural topics, with strong collocational accuracy.
Maintain this precision while tailoring technical vocabulary more closely to housing development and land-use planning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sophisticated structures is used accurately and flexibly, with virtually no grammatical errors across the response.
Preserve this control while ensuring introductory material is integrated as a complete sentence rather than left as an editorial fragment.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?
Your response
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